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March 30 -
Weekend special notice: 
     Rule #1 in Texas is .....

Never hack-off a woman who owns a backhoe!

March 30 - Rats, meet lifeboat.

Several impending departures from the White House could further complicate life for the hard-pressed Bush administration.

Peter Wehner, the head of strategic initiatives, and political director Sara Taylor are expected to be heading for the White House exits soon, according to a person familiar with the situation. Barry Jackson, a longtime aide to Karl Rove, also is thought to be leaving soon. A White House spokesman confirmed Wehner’s imminent departure, but declined to comment on the others.

Despite the maelstrom of controversy and complication at the White House these days, all the departures appear to be more-or-less routine turnover. Several of the aides have been with the administration virtually from the outset.

     Routine turnovers, my patootie.  I heard they were leaving for health reasons - sick of Bush.

March 30 - Holy fluffy bunny rabbits!  This guy has pictures or something --- 

The White House said Friday it believes Attorney General Alberto Gonzales can survive the uproar over the firing of eight federal prosecutors, a day after his one-time chief of staff undercut Gonzales' account of the firings.

"I can tell you that the president has confidence in him," said Deputy White House press secretary Dana Perino. "The president believes the attorney general can overcome the challenges that are before him."

     I’ve got 4 dollars perfectly good American cash money that says he’s won’t be celebrating Cinco de Mayo as General.  Anybody want to play?
     I guess with approval rating at 33% that's about as low as they can go, even with pictures.

March 29 - Okay, now here’s an idea.  Democratic Senator Jon Tester of Montana posts his daily schedule on his website so his constituents will know what he’s doing all day. 
     You know what’s coming, don’t you?
     What would Texas Republican Senator John Cornyn’s daily schedule look like? 

8:00 – Awake to bedside photo of George W. Bush.  Kiss it.

8:30 – Do hair. 

9:00 – Redo hair. 

9:30 – Call Kay and ask her if I can be the Senior Senator from Texas this week. Just this week.  Puuuuullleese. Just a day, huh, maybe just for a day?  Huh?  Huh? 

10:00 – Call Jack Abramoff and remind him that we never, ever discussed Indian casinos – it was “Bindian placebos” that we discussed.

10:30 – Meet with a couple of soldiers. Ask them to salute me. Holler, “Drop!  Incoming!” just for fun.  Soldiers like that.

11:00 – Think up dirty words that rhyme with Pelosi.

11:30 – Call Rush’s radio show, tell them my name is Ted from Vermont and say, “That Cornyn dude should be President!”  Repeat tomorrow as Ted from Wyoming. 

12:00 – Learn to say, “Barbara Boxer” without giggling.

12:30 – Eat beans for lunch.  Chemical warfare with the Democrats on the Judicial Committee.

1:00 – Find my butt with both hands, a road map and a tour guide.  Kiss it.

1:30 – Meet with the Belles of Heaven Republican Women for Truth, Justice, and Big Ole Honkin’ Hair.

2:00 – Meet with Girl Scouts.  Remind them that I love their cookies!

2:30 – Ponder:  if he’s not homosexual, how come his name is Leahy.

3:00 – Ask someone if it’s okay for me to take a power nap since we lost power.

3:30 – Nominate Ann Coulter for Miss Almost Texas!

4:00 – Threaten a couple of judges.

4:30 – Deny threatening judges.  Claim I was misunderstood; I was threatening pudges. 

5:00 – Find an endangered species.  Kill it.

5:30 – Call up people at random and ask, “Are you on America’s side?”  Report results to Karl Rove.

6:00 – Call Clarence Thomas, explain that he wasn’t one of the judges I thought needed killin’ and ask if I can borrow his robe for the weekend. 

6:30 – Sneak up behind Ted Kennedy, tap him on the shoulder and holler “Taxachusetts!” He hates that.

7:00 – Stare lovingly at my Senate pass.  Kiss it goodbye.

March 29 - Our friend Rich gave us a heads-up on the Top One Hundred April Fool's jokes
     The spaghetti one is pretty good.  I recall a guy on the radio telling a story about how the macaroni crop was bad that year because the winds didn't get heavy enough to blow out the centers. 

Thought I'd share this one with you.

One of my pitch-in jobs at the church I attend is that I come in during the week and put together the PowerPoint presentation of hymn lyrics that we use during the Sunday morning service. We beam the lyrics up on a huge screen so people don't have to squint at little hymnals. Well, this week, when they start the service, the first thing that's going to come up on the screen is not the lyrics to "I Stand Amazed," but rather the lyrics to "Drop Kick Me Jesus, Through The Goalposts Of Life." I, of course, will be far away when it happens, so others will have to let me know how it turns out.



I just can't believe it.  The BEST one was the NPR bit in the mid-1980s.  They did a story that really had me going.  It was about the US selling ARIZONA to Canada.  Seriously.  They got all the big shots to play along, including the then-Governor Bruce Babbitt.  Everybody SEEMED to be completely sincere in saying why this was such a win-win deal for both countries. 

Until it was mentioned that Canada had always wanted a warm-water PORT.  That's when I lost it.

One of my friends at that time worked as a librarian for NPR.  Over drinks in a bar very soon after, another member of our group suggested that I join Rick Segel for the next year's broadcast as the "Segel Heil Report."  Giggle.


March 29 - I never ceased to be amazed at what people will do for money. 
     For a job, Bob Barr – yes, that Bob Barr – has decided to do a half gainer triple-axel double flip on his feelings about the wild weed

Bob Barr, who as a Georgia congressman authored a successful amendment that blocked D.C. from implementing a medical marijuana initiative, has switched sides and become a lobbyist for the Marijuana Policy Project. 

     Yep, this is the same Bob Barr who led the fight against medical marijuana.
     Now he’s saying that government interference is far more evil than marijuana. 
     For $1.98 he’ll swear that he loves Bill Clinton.  For a crisp twenty dollar bill, he'll light-up in front of you.  You don't even wanna know what he'll do for fifty.  Okay, so maybe you do.  It involves a satellite dish, strawberry jelly, a Barry Manilow eight track tape and Mrs. Fred Thompson

March 28 - Our friend Alfredo sends Tom DeLay a heads-up.  Yo, dude, sell some more books.
     It seems that Tom DeLay may owe the IRS some major back taxes.  He took Christine on several of his "fact-finding" missions with Jack Abramoff, and now ....

Lawmakers and staff who like to take spouses and children on “fact-finding” missions received some bad news Tuesday.

 IRS Commissioner Mark Everson told a gathering at the National Press Club that politicians are held to “the same standards” as other Americans. He was responding to a question as to whether lawmakers could take family members with them on free trips without reporting that to the IRS.

“We do hold politicians and others to the same standards of the law,” Everson said. “We do hold all Americans to the same standards as to what is income and what is not.”

     Can you even imagine the shock at the DeLay household when they are informed that they shall be treated like other Americans? 
     I give them two weeks before Christine has him out selling those books door to door with a little cart, and a change making machine. 
     I tell ya, I'm still waiting for the $1.99 table at the Bookstop. 

March 28 - Wooo, woooo.  Democratic news.  They are lining up to run against John Cornyn!  Kudos to Bob Dunn for the news.
     Of course, I think Rick Noriega is all that, and his wife Melissa is all that and a bag a chips.  He'd be almost impossible to beat in Texas.  Richard Morrison's site to draft Rick is getting great response.
     Your guess is as good as mine for who the Fort Bend connection candidate would be, because Noriega has a Fort Bend connection, too -- his in-laws, Melissa's parents, live here. 

March 28 - You know, life without James Dobson around wouldn’t be near as entertaining.  He’s passing judgment on people’s Christianity, again.  He’s not all that wild about Republicans Presidential contender/actor Fred Thompson. 

Focus on the Family founder James Dobson appeared to throw cold water on a possible presidential bid by former Sen. Fred Thompson while praising former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, who is also weighing a presidential run, in a phone interview Tuesday. 

"Everyone knows he's conservative and has come out strongly for the things that the pro-family movement stands for," Dobson said of Thompson. "[But] I don't think he's a Christian; at least that's my impression," Dobson added ...

     Deb sent me this picture of Thompson and his lovely new wife, Jeri, who is adorably 25 years younger than he is. I'm sure they met at Bible study or at least wherever Newt and second wife met.  Or was it his third?  I get them all confused.
     Now see, she looks like she'd fit right in over at our local Belles of Heaven Republican Women's Club. 
     And, no, I do not know where her pole is.    

Hey, Suze - got a good look at the pic of Fred Thompson and his wife that you posted yesterday. Certainly there was plenty of material for a good look. There are laws against that dress she's almost wearing in some states - I'd wager Texas and Kentucky are among them. 

And he proposes that she be our First Lady? 

Ya know, quite a few of the Republican preznit candidates have trophy wives - have you seen Mrs. Giuliani or Mrs. McCain? Only boring old Mitt Romney has a wife that's age-appropriate for him, but then, who cares, right? 

One last thing - you said ol' Fred's wife is 25 years younger than him. I saw somewhere yesterday that he's 64, which would make her 39. 

If that girl's a day over 30, it would surprise me almost as much as ol' Fred actually winning the preznitcy. 

Shelbyville KY

March 28 - Under the category of "You can say that again, Brother!" Tom DeLay's latest ghost-written article for Townhall is entitled ....

Scooter Libby is no Bill Clinton

     Hell, Tom, Scooter ain't even no Hillary Clinton, but I don't think we mean it in the same way.
     Tom argues that Scooter lied under oath, sure, but it was about something that isn't important.  Like, you know, outing a CIA agent who, I'm sure Tom would argue, had hooters so she couldn't be like, you know, a real CIA agent.  She was a girl, for pete's sake.
     Bill Clinton, on the other hand, lied about something very important.  Hoochy Koochy. 
     Have you ever tried to count the stars in the sky on a clear night?  That's how many times Tom DeLay has lied about Hoochy Koochy. 
     Tom DeLay is having a full-fledged nervous breakdown and he wants us to watch.  Trust me on this, it's gonna get worse.  He's gonna keep saying really insane stuff.  It's so much fun!
     Thanks to Patrick for the heads-up on this one.

March 28 - Okay, so Faux Jesus Folks have another poster child.
     Alberto Gonzales’ lawyer will take the Fifth Amendment at the Senate hearing

  According to AP and Bloomberg News, Monica Goodling, a counsel to U.S. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales who helped coordinate the dismissals, will invoke her constitutional right not to answer questions.

      There’s nothing odd about a lawyer exercising her constitutional rights.  I strongly support the Constitution, even for writ twits.
     But, what is odd is that Goodling is just doing what Jesus would do

Goodling, 33, is a 1995 graduate Messiah College in Grantham, Pa., an institution that describes itself as "committed to embracing an evangelical spirit."

She received her law degree at Regent University in Virginia Beach, Va. Regent, founded by Christian broadcaster Pat Robertson, says its mission is "to produce Christian leaders who will make a difference, who will change the world."

     If you’re going to make a difference and change the world, you probably need to speak up.   

Nevertheless even among the rulers many believed in Him, but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him, lest they should be put out of the synagogue; for they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God (John 12:42-43).


March 27 - Keith Olbermann talks about a treasure in Tom DeLay's book.  I just love You Tube!
     It's a real shame that Tom's book hasn't made even the Top Thirty best seller list.  I haven't bought one yet because I'm waiting until next week when it goes on sale for $1.99.

March 27 - On an exceedingly rare serious note, if you haven't read Nora Ephron on Katie Couric, you've missed some wisdom. 
     Shame on you, Katie. 

     With cancer hitting headlines lately, here's a Relay for Life in Fort Bend County in PDF format. Please print it out, write a small check, and mail it to have a luminaria dedicated to someone who died of cancer or is living with cancer.  If you live out of town, please let me know you've donated and I will go take a picture of your luminaria and email it to you.  Twenty bucks isn't a lot of money to do something this nice. 
     It's a beautiful event.  Your luninaria will stay lit all night as teams take turns walking the pathway around them. 

March 26 - Please keep Congressman Nick Lampson in your prayers. 

U.S. Rep. Nick Lampson underwent quadruple coronary bypass surgery on Sunday to treat blockages of the arteries on the surface of his heart, Lampson’s office revealed late Monday morning.

Doctors said the surgery went well and that Lampson, D-Stafford, will make a full recovery, according to a statement from the congressman’s office.

March 26 - I guess we can be relieved that Nadine Craddick didn't put in the brass toilet.  To be honest, I thought Nadine was more the faux finish and lotsa gold leaf type. 

     Justifying raising one million dollars to redo her house at the Capitol while Texas children were cut from state health insurance, Nadine said ...

"History is so important. We have to understand where we came from to know where we're going."

     Nadine's a damn philosopher, ain't she?
     It's the House that Lobbyists Built, Nadine, so get off your high horse. 
     But, Nadine, don't get too comfortable in your new digs because in two years, Senfronia Thompson is gonna be living in that house. 
     And I'm a friend of Senfronia's so I'll get an invite to dinner or something.  I'm moving that tv, Nadine.  And that mirror is trashy, too.  And that rug....

March 26 - Okay, so you need more proof that it’s all about money?  The American Conservative Union, which hates everything Tom DeLay believes in, gave him a position on their board simply because he can raise money. 
     One million dollars.  An amount, I suspect, that he learned from Sugar Land Mayor David Wallace.
     However, four board members resigned over it
     The Houston Chronicle adds some details I thought you’d like ---- 

Keene said DeLay had proposed an effort under which he'd raise $1 million for a grassroots lobbying effort, which DeLay would then run. But that idea was shelved when Keene and DeLay failed to agree on some of the details of how it would operate, Keene said. 

     Yeah, like Keene wanted to use it for conservative causes and DeLay wanted to use it for golf and cigars.
     Wouldn’t you have loved to be a fly on the wall for that discussion!

March 25 - Thank you, Nick Anderson!

March 24 - On the other hand, maybe Tom DeLay will take a trip to the pokey.
     The Washington Post has some inside sources that say it's a good thing Tom got his book out so fast that even he didn't have time to read it because the Convicted Felon Bargain Table over at Bookstop got discontinued after O.J. got found not guilty.

The Griles plea comes at a time when the Justice Department is being criticized by congressional Democrats who have alleged that the Bush administration fired several U.S. attorneys because they pursued corruption investigations of Republicans or did not swiftly bring charges against Democrats. Several of the more than 40 career law-enforcement officials working on the Abramoff task force said there is a vigorous, ongoing investigation of current and former Republican members of Congress.
Among those who have been convicted or pleaded guilty in the scandal besides Abramoff are former Congressman Bob Ney, R-Ohio; David Safavian, former deputy director of the White House Office of Management and Budget; and several former congressional aides who had become lobbyists, including two who once worked for Tom DeLay, R-Texas, when he was House majority leader. DeLay resigned from Congress last year and is a figure in the continuing probe, sources familiar with the investigation have said.

     The above bolding is mine.  I might start highlighting the good parts.  It's just another free friendly customer service we offer here. 
     Okay, so now we get the deal with the words, "vigorous, ongoing investigation of current and former Republican members of Congress."  Members.  With an S.  Oh be still my heart. 
     Anybody want to offer-up names?  Or how 'bout Names We Hope To See?

As much as I'd like to see Denny Hastert, I would love to see Joe Barton go down.  Do you think he would sit at his trial with a newspaper in front of his face like he did when Al Gore addressed the house?

Sam in Pearland


March 23 - Matt Angle over at the Lone Star Project has an interesting take on why Tom DeLay isn't sitting in stinkin' jail.  Matt's a smart guy and has been following this stuff closely. 

Is DOJ Shielding DeLay?
As Tom DeLay resurfaces, Republican Public Integrity Chief may be stalling investigation

Almost two years ago, the Lone Star Project helped break the story of how partisan political appointees within the Voting Rights Section of the Justice Department overruled professional voting rights experts to approve Tom DeLay's Texas redistricting scheme. Under George W. Bush, partisan bureaucrats and political operatives have been systematically embedded within federal agencies to do the Republican Party’s political bidding.

     Go read it.  It's important.  I would not send you on a fool's errand and neither would Matt Angle.

March 22 - Hummmmm……
     Do you think Abramoff may be ratting-out Tom DeLay?   

Reduced sentence in works for Abramoff

'Some of the information provided by the defendant to the government within one year of the [March 29, 2006, SunCruz] sentencing did not become useful to the government until recently because it concerns the investigation of others outside the Southern District of Florida,'' prosecutor Paul Schwartz wrote in his filing.

     I have some very cynical friends who suspect that Tom’s recent shouts-outs are well-planned, just like all his other political moves.  Tom knows a federal indictment is coming.  He’s doing all this crazzzy-man talking about his own political party so he can claim, “See, they just want to shut me up,” when the indictment does come down.
     I am not that cynical …. yet.  I think he’s just addicted to teevee cameras.  However, I am likely to change my mind about that if he keeps it up.  Tom is a conniving son of a motherless goat.

Hi Susan,
Did you see Tomboy on Hardball Tuesday?  Chris quoted from Tom's book and Tom claimed he didn't write that even though Chris handed him the book.  Then Tom said he didn't have his glasses.  I am being serious now..I don't think Tom can read or not read well.  Remember when he said he didn't write his own blog because he didn't write well..I think he is trying to hide this and you are the only who can ferret out this info.  When he was on Hardball he looked like a deer in the headlights when Chris handed him that book.  I've seen kids who can't read and they look like that too.   A friend of mine was teaching an old guy how to read and I saw that look on him also.  He could have gone all that time with someone else reading things to him, that could be why he screwed up the facts.  Think about it..investigate.  You can do it.


March 22 - Tom DeLay has more excuses than the Lamar High School attendance office.
     You just gotta see this You Tube.  This is so typical of Tom.  Watch him say, "Who ya gonna believe?  Me or your lying eyes?" 
     And from our friends at Fire Dog Lake ---

March 22 - Oh my, how times have changed ....

Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich said in Nashville that the personal lives of White House hopefuls shouldn't become an issue in the 2008 campaign.

     It seems that Newt's pants fit a little loose in the family values area.

March 21 - So maybe I did too many drugs in the 60’s or something, but I’m having flashbacks.
     I was listening to the radio the other night and heard that Fred Fielding is Bush’s writ twit.  Fred Fielding?  Nah, it couldn’t be.  Not Fred Fielding of Watergate fame.  Nooooo….  Yesssss………

He served as Associate Counsel for President Richard Nixon from 1970 to 1972.

     So, I’m feeling kinda shaky, thinking maybe I accidentally took acid and didn’t know it but now I’m having flashbacks, when this comes up from Josh Marshall ---- 

…the emails released by the Justice Department seem to have a gap between November 15th and December 4th of last year.

      That’s 18 days.  Creepy.  Rosemary Woods, 18 minutes
     Then, I was talking to Momma yesterday and she said that Bush had better get us out of Viet Nam before we lose everything and don’t have enough of a military to protect this country.  I replied with a shaky voice, “Momma, you said Viet Nam.”  She said, “I did, didn’t I?” 
     Yep – it feels like déjŕ vu all over again.

March 21 - Spread the word - keep another Tom DeLay from happening.
     Only you can prevent Congressvarmints.

March 21 - Okay, here's the deal.  We're all going to start rooting for Tom DeLay because he's causing far more trouble for them than he is for us.
     Roll Call (subscription only) did a story today entitled "DeLay Prompts Revolt at ACU: Conservative Group Roiled."
     I don't know any liberals who can roil a conservative group, so Go, Tom, Go! (By the way, the headline writer must have look up that particular definition because it's so cool in this case.)

“He carried the water for some of the biggest government expansions in the history of the republic,” said Marc Rotterman, a North Carolina political strategist who quit the board after DeLay was nominated. “We looked at Tom DeLay to stop those kinds of bills, not to promote them. He was complicit.”

     You just gotta love Roll Call - get yourself a subscription.

   I promise to proofread this before sending.  That last one was nearly as incoherent as Tomclown himself who appears to have taken to referring to himself in the third person.  Consider this excerpt of an excerpt that I found right here. Mr. jurassicpork is not the most delicate individual.  Read his blog with caution because you never know whether you're going to laugh or cry or fall into the depths of despair.  This one way more to be laughing.

"If you want the definition of insane, read the last page of Sunday’s Meet the Press transcript. On MTP with Tim Russert was Tom DeLay, Richard Perle and Rep. Joe Sestak, among others. DeLay… OK, I’m stumped here as to why Tim Russert had even let this malignant little freak onto the sound stage, to begin with. Former Rep. Andrews, I could understand. But Tom DeLay, a guy who flew a Big Tobacco corporate jet to his own arraignment and spent every waking moment dedicated not to serving his country but to enriching himself and ensuring Republican, one party supremacy, is simply about as relevant as the lint in my navel.

This is a priceless lesson in patriotism from Tom DeLay:

     'Well, I--it, it is my opinion that when you go to war, we ought to all come together. You can debate going to war, that's a legitimate debate. But once you have our soldiers and our, our young people dying on the battlefield, we should come together, and we shouldn't have what we had yesterday on the Mall of, of, of--in Washington, D.C. When the--those are not, in my mind--my opinion, patriots that are talking about impeaching the commander in chief, that are--that are--work as, as Tom's group works....'

Now, even if any one of those sentences could be interpreted as semi-coherent by the most doting, supportive and forgiving of rhetoric and English professors, none of them would still make any sense. Because the import of what DeLay had said was not in what he said but in what he’s ignoring. It’s unpatriotic to criticize the president because he lied us into an illegal and totally unnecessary war. It’s wrong to advance a timetable for withdrawal because it emboldens the enemy because our military isn’t funded well enough or manned well enough or competent enough to finish a job by a specific deadline."

Did you catch that part about "as Tom's group works"?  He must be starting to dissociate himself from himself.

Don in PA where the snow is melting.


March 21 - Okay, now it’s personal.  Tom DeLay is now lying about me. 
     In today’s Houston Chronicle, Craig Hines quotes extensively from Tom DeLay’s book so you don’t have to go buy it.
     But the part that caused Bubba to spit cornflakes across the breakfast room floor and holler, “Susan, bring the Bible in here right now and hold it over this newspaper before something gawdawful happens,” is this ---

That leads up to DeLay describing how, in his Austin heyday he acquired the nickname "Hot Tub Tom," which he says was coined by Beverly Carter of the Fort Bend Star, and how he deserved it. "I slept with women I wasn't married to."

     Bev Carter most certainly did not coin that phrase.  She did, however, pay my salary to coin that phrase and, to her everlasting credit, she did allow me to print it in her newspaper. I coined it. Well, see, that’s not true either.  Bubba coined it. Here’s how it happened.
     A former State Representative, who shall remain nameless, told me stories about Tom’s behavior in Austin, including Macho Manor Apartments, the Capitol Club, that little post office employee, hot tubs, and other stuff you can’t put on a family website.
     I came home and told Bubba all about it.  Bubba was enjoying the stories of self-righteous Tom and when I got to the hot tub part, he shouted out …. you guessed it …. Bitchin’ Betty and the Sequined Backhoes! 
     No, I’m just kidding.  Bitchin’ Betty and the Backhoes are my creation, but Bubba coined Hot Tub Tom right there on the spot.  I have witnesses.
     I printed it in Bev’s newspaper.  Tom pitched a fit, denying it all.  For 15 years he went around here telling people that I was just making stuff up about him.  He was righteous, pure, but maybe – just maybe – he drank just a tiny tad too much, just a tee wennie little bit mind you, but that was all.  He told everyone that I was the biggest liar east of San Francisco.
     I begged him to sue me.  Now we know why he didn’t. 
     Okay, so I was lucky enough to live long enough to see him finally admit that he truly was Hot Tub Tom and deserved that nickname.  But, the lying son of a motherless goat wouldn’t even give me credit for it. Damn, I feel like Moses.  I saw the Promised Land but didn’t get to go.
     That’s why he’s still a twit in my book.
     Hey Tom, what about Sweetwater Joann?  We're gonna do this again, son.   

     If anybody’s interested, here’s some of the things I wrote about Tom, but it only goes back to 1998

Warning!  Do not open the Chronicle this morning!

Leave it in the little plastic bag. 

You'll be sooooorrrrryyyyyy...... 

Too late - you opened it.  

Must be a slow news day. I did NOT appreciate a huge front page picture and article about that scumbag and his lousy piece of fiction. Almost choked on my coffee. Christine probably did, too. Okay, so the loser wrote a book. Put in in a little column on the lower left, or better yet, bury it in the Sunday book section that can be easily ignored. Sheesh.


PS Loved the Meredith interview.



March 20 - Oh dear, somebody's getting a little testy.

Besides his considerable security contingent, the chief executive was accompanied by Deputy Chief of Staff Karl Rove and Press Secretary Tony Snow.

A reporter approached Rove to ask him what he thought of rumors that former Missouri Sen. Jack Danforth could replace embattled Attorney General Alberto Gonzales. “How about you go over there and do your job,” Rove replied, pointed back to the media pool.

     Let me get this straight:  Meier and Rove are willing to "inform" the Congress as long as informing doesn't involve the truth.
     Why do these people have such a hard time with swearing the tell the truth?  It's simple - people all over America do it in courthouses everyday. 
     Remember when Republicans believed in oaths and telling the truth and partisan politics?  I do.

March 20 - A couple more smart questions like that and Meredith can get a job here.

Vieria : You say to fight, but the name of your book is " No retreat, No Surrender," but didn't you give up your battle?

 Delay: No…(timidly) I just changed arenas..hahahaha

Vieria: But in essence you did, You stepped aside.

Delay: Well, in politics you gotta make certain decisions for personal reasons…

     Personal reasons?  Like you're fixing to be outted as a crook and a liar?  Yep, that would be personal.

March 20 Alfredo says it happened. 
     Hell froze over. 
     He agrees with Tom DeLay.

Former House Republican Leader Tom DeLay had said earlier Tuesday that the scandal "is just a taste of what's going to be like for the next two years."

March 20 - Apparently, Tom DeLay’s vicious personal attacks of Newt Gingrich isn’t staying on for the full nine seconds with Texas Republicans. 
     The Dallas Morning News did a survey of Texas Republican insiders – the GOP State Executive Committee – and found that they like Newt.   

None of the GOP presidential front-runners has generated much support among Republican Party loyalists in Texas, whose early favorite to head the ticket in 2008 hasn't even announced – Newt Gingrich.

     But mostly, they don’t like any of the field. 
    Hey Guys, I hear there’s another Bush looking for his place in the family business. 

Tom, Tom, the drunkard's son,
Stole some pork, and away did run!
The pork was neat,
But Tom was beat,
And went off crying
Down the street.


Hey Susan, 

Poor Tomboy..he's bored and has a lot of time on his hands..he better get used to it once he arrives in the slammer.


March 20 - The Commissioner Tom Stavinoha Memorial Landfill has progressed another step forward.
     Although citizens are fighting it, it's like trying a turn a pair of boots back into an alligator - especially when your county commissioner sees dollar signs.
     Gather 'round and figure this ----

Without being able to expand the facility from its current 302-acre “waste footprint,” where refuse is permitted to be piled up to 58 feet high, the landfill will be full in 13 years. Increasing the footprint to 784 acres, and the allowable height to 170 feet, would extend the life of the landfill for 40 years.

     Okay, picture a 170 foot tall landfill that covers almost 800 acres.  They're building a damn mountain range of stink. 
     Stavinoha better plan another trip to Hawaii this summer just in case the wond shifts.

March 20 - And the email just keeps on coming ---


I know you run a family-oriented site so talking about a book with the title like "The No Asshole Rule" could be pushing the envelope.  But when I used the Google test as described here, Our favorite ex-Congressclown only got 309,000 hits which puts him way ahead of Terrell Owens but not only about half of what Paris Hilton gets.  But he's way ahead of Newt who polls less than 80,000.

But the fact remains that Tom meets just about all the criteria and the fact that his staff could put up with him but couldn't take Ms. Shelley Belle who only gets 132.

Don A.

     That is one cool book. 

March 19 - Email from Patrick:

Is he about to be indicted and rallying support/sympathy or is he trying to push his new book

"There is something else happening today, though, that must come to an end if this country is going to have serious leaders at its helm. Today it is not enough to defeat a man politically. It is not even enough to vilify him publicly. You have to carpet bomb his life. You have to make sure that he leaves office disgraced, bankrupt, and heading for jail. You have to ruin him in every way, and then dance on his grave."

"What I did not expect was a concerted effort to destroy me legally, financially, and personally. I have now spent millions of dollars in lawyers' fees to answer the lies of the left. I have taken hours away from doing the nation's business to work through the laborious process of responding to legal charges that my liberal opponents knew were untrue and frivolous when they first filed them"

And you know who's fault it is right?

"But the liberals could not win on the floor or at the ballot box, so they tried to win by hurting us personally. Like good communists, when they cannot defeat their enemies politically they seek to destroy them personally, and this is what they did to us."


     Communist.  That's so nifty.  It's been 20 years since someone called me a Commie.  But it has a good ring to it and Lord knows I've missed it.
     Okay, so we're out to destroy Tom because we're Commies.  Got that, but what's Tom for trying to destroy Newt?  Good-Fascist-in-Training?
     And what is Tom for devoting 8 years of his life trying to destroy Bill Clinton personally?  Uh, Dork?  Nerd?Twit?  Nincompoop?  Hey, I'm running out of names here.
     So, Patrick, in answer to your question, "... is he rallying sympathy or trying to push his new book?" ... my answer is this story:
     A friend of mine flew home from DeeCee last Friday and Tom DeLay was on the plane.  Only this time instead of flying first class, Tom DeLay was flying third class.  Third class.  No corporate jet of his own, no free wine - third class.
     Tom DeLay is trying to "be somebody," Patrick, but if that fails, he'll settle for lots of money.  After all, there are no third class golf courses.
     Sometimes I feel sorry for him, but not much and not often.

As usual the sphincter of all sphincters (little Tommy DeLay) can dish it out but can't take it.  One must remember one of the biggest reasons he was called the 'Hammer'--it was the dirt he would collect on others , especially Republicans, and then use it to make sure they voted his way.  What a spoiled little boy who never grew up.  He's a sick sociopath who should be behind bars.



What Tom D. and his ilk never understood is that representing the public is a PRIVILEGE.  It is NOT a way to make yourself more important, or to enrich yourself.  This is a lesson lost on most of this new generation of Rethugs.

He laid waste to as many Democrats as he possibly could and now he's crying "Unfair."  I'll pay the least little attention to him when he publicly apologizes for his innumerable sins against those who other Americans elected to represent them.  Starting, but not ending, with Bill Clinton.

Until he understands that, I won't be listening.


Miss Susan,
Oh, Lordy!  I heard some of Delay's interview on NPR this morning, talking about his daddy being an alcoholic and not being part of little Tom's life early on, and how his mama was an enabler, and how it all forced him to make it on his own at an early age, and that he's a better person for it all since he got "born again."  And here I always thought "conservatives" and/or Republicans didn't air their dirty laundry in public...
Imagine, Tom on NPR.  Now we know how "low" he'll go to promote himself and his tell-all book!  Wonder how many times he voted to cut funding for public radio?

DeLay's book went on sale in D.C. today.  Its on the new releases table at Barnes & Noble - at 30% off the list price!
Remainder bin here we come!


March 18 - Tom DeLay has scheduled a book signing in Sugar Land on march 27th.  I've already making sign to take!

     The Washington Post gets a "No shoot, Sherlock" quote from DeLay.

Mr. DeLay, who is trying through his book and a Web site to become an influential conservative voice outside Congress, does admit to a dark side. “We are all flawed,” he writes in the book. “And my flaw is that I can sometimes be aggressive, even mean.”

Hey Miss Susan -
I could stomach only so much of TD on MTP yesterday, but while I was watching, I believe I noticed that he wasn't wearing a wedding ring.  I'm not sure about this, cause he was waving his hands around so much to distract listeners from all the "uhs" and "ums" he articulates so well.
Anyway, if he wasn't wearing a ring, do you suppose it's because he and the missus don't "officially" live in the same state anymore?

March 18 - Our friend Dave passes this along ---

New Republican slogan:
'Prosecutors will be violated.'

March 18 - Yeah, yeah, Tom DeLay was on Meet the Press.
     Yeah, yeah, he’s still bitter, divisive, mean, and a chicken hawk.
     Yeah, yeah, he said we can't retreat and surrender and Iraq, but that's exactly what he did in District 22.
     Yeah, yeah, he wants your child to fight in Iraq, but not his.
     Yeah, yeah, he should be in stinkin’ jail.    
     But, look at it this way – it was Sunday morning and he wasn’t in church.  Maybe they finally kicked him out.

March 18 - Oh great, now they're trying to kill our pets.
     Am I the only person who thinks all this bad food is just a little weird? 

A major manufacturer of dog and cat food sold under Wal-Mart, Safeway, Kroger and other store brands recalled 60 million containers of wet pet food Friday after reports of kidney failure and deaths.

     Oh, just wait until they find out that I have a dog named Truman. 

March 17 - Okay, so I'm listening to the radio late last night and up pops this little bit of news.  I thought I was hearing things until Deb sent it to me on the Internet machine.

Members of extremist groups have signed up as school bus drivers in the United States, counterterror officials said Friday, in a cautionary bulletin to police. An FBI spokesman said "parents and children have nothing to fear."

Asked about the alert notice, the FBI's Rich Kolko said "there are no threats, no plots and no history leading us to believe there is any reason for concern," although law enforcement agencies around the country were asked to watch out for kids' safety.

     Nothing to fear?  I dunno, in my version of the English language, a warning is generally to steer you away from something harmful.  I mean, rarely do you see a sign with "Warning! A birthday party!"  Or, "Warning! You just won the lottery!" 
     And why would you send the bulletin to the police?  Why wouldn't you send it to .... oh, I dunno ... the people who freekin' hire school bus drivers maybe?
     Let me guess:  This warning was sent out by a a Bush appointee? 
     I'm tellin' ya - we gotta get rid of these guys.  They're tinkering with our minds now. 

March 16 - Democratic State Representative Dora Olivo has developed a bad case of what my grandmother used to call “titched in the head.”
     As if we don’t have other pressing needs in this legislative district, Olivo has gone and authored – not sponsored, not supported – but authored, dammit, the anti-stem cell research bill in the Texas House.
     We have three state representatives from Fort Bend County. You’d think at least one of them would support stem cell research.  But, no, the only Democratic voice we have in Austin is leading the way, arming the troops, and yelling the loudest to kill stem cell research in Texas. 
     If Dora Olivo feels it is her duty to shove her personal religious beliefs down my throat, then I suggest that she needs to join either the Republican Party or the Taliban.  Her choice. 
     She is the only Democrat with her name on that bill.
     She can take a number and stand in line behind Charlie Howard to kiss my big blue butt. 

March 16 - Okay, so I’m not saying that the Fort Bend County delegation to Austin is worthless as last year’s lottery ticket, but …… well, now wait.  I think that’s exactly what I’m saying.
     State Rep. Charlie Howard, who acts like he’s Jesus’ official translator to us common sinners, has introduced another religion-in-school bill.
     Okay, here’s the deal. I’ll be for religion in school when they start teaching algebra in church.
     The schools have enough to do without fretting over Charlie’s religious practices. 
     To make matters even more hypocritical, Charlie homeschooled all his kids, but wants to tell us how to do things in the real world. 

March 16 - Oh lookie, this is cute.
     Tom DeLay blames a vast right-wing conspiracy for his downfall.

 Gingrich is not the only erstwhile political ally to feel DeLay's wrath. In "No Retreat, No Surrender: One American's Fight," DeLay is even more critical of his predecessor as majority leader, Dick Armey, and assails George W. Bush as being more compassionate than conservative. Even the man DeLay handpicked to succeed Gingrich as speaker, J. Dennis Hastert, is accused along with Gingrich and Armey of opening the door to the Democratic purge of DeLay.

     Now we know why Newt admitted the affair.  He knew DeLay was about to do it for him. 
     What a vicious little witch DeLay turned out to be!

March 15 - Okay guys, when you're real bored, go on over to amazon dot com , scroll down, and read the "tags" that customers have put on Tom DeLay's new book.

March 15 - Hiding Hooters.  There’s just got to be a country/western song about this.
     Roll Call (subscription only) has a story that can’t help but catch your eye.  It was about how come politicians hide the donors to certain PACs.

Last June, a political action committee called the Freedom, Security, Prosperity PAC formed and started collecting checks from Florida donors.

The fund was not identified with any federal candidate, but there were some clues as to who might be behind it: The majority of donors were executives at Hooters, the suggestively named chain of restaurants known for its busty wait staff in short shorts and tight tops.

      If there’s not already a country song about Hiding Hooters’ Donors, we’re gonna have to buckle down and write one.

March 15 - Politico reviews Tom DeLay's new book, and quotes from the forward ....

Rush Limbaugh says it is "sad" that "in the end there were very few people willing to stand up for DeLay and try to refute some of these baseless charges that were bandied around about him." Then Sean Hannity weighs in to say he thinks the country would "would be better off if all 435 members of the House were just like Tom Delay – "relentless in defense of traditional values" and "savvy about politics."

     Sorry, Sean, but there's not enough golf balls, cigars, hussies and kickbacks in the entire world for all 435 members of Congress to be just like Tom. 
     And there was one small hint about why DeLay was never able to keep staff around very long ....

His practical advice for new members of Congress includes "involve your wife in all hiring," which he certainly did, so that the staff knows she outranks them.

     Yeah, but Christine thinks she outranks God. 

March 15 - Tom DeLay is returning to the scene of the crime!  He's having a book signing in DeeCee.  It's at the Capitol Hill Club, and I wonder if Jack Abramoff is coming?
     By the way, it's nice to know that Dani DeLay Fero still has a job.
     You know the drill, click the little one to get the big one.

     And you, too, can RSVP right here.

What do you say we all RSVP to Tom’s book-a-palooza so he thinks all his friends from the TX-022 are comin’ to DEE CEE to see him and contribute to his defense funds.  Then Dani can figure out how many cookies to order and earn her salary. 



March 14 - Our friend David pointed us to an article linking Tom DeLay / Jack Abramoff / Bush / and the US Attorney firings.

A US grand jury in Guam opened an investigation of controversial lobbyist Jack Abramoff more than two years ago, but President Bush removed the supervising federal prosecutor, and the probe ended soon after.

The previously undisclosed Guam inquiry is separate from a federal grand jury in the District of Columbia that is investigating allegations that Abramoff bilked Indian tribes out of millions of dollars.

     Bush is beginning to make Nixon look like a piker.

March 14 - This couldn't be good.

All sleeping pills, including the blockbusters Ambien and Lunesta, may sometimes cause a bizarre but dangerous side effect -- sleep-driving, the Food and Drug Administration warned Wednesday.

     I think they can also cause sleep-legislating, which would explain State Rep. Dora Olivo.

March 14 - Good Lord, John Cornyn is an idiot.  He's talking about how US Attorneys became political pawns.

“Appearances are troubling. This has not been handled well,” said John Cornyn, R-Texas. “But in Texas we believe in having a fair trial and then the hanging.”

     "Not well handled" is the new GOP catch-phrase meaning:  not kept secret enough.
     Thanks to Deb for the heads-up on Cornyn talking stoopid. 

March 14 - Roll Call (subscription only) has a nifty article today outlining the PBS&J political scandal.  Look, I know it's not as sexy as Newt's making his girlfriends do everything Monica did, but it is kinda sexy in that we all got screwed. 

But, prosecutors allege, at the same time they were climbing the corporate ladder, the duo concocted an elaborate plan to funnel illegal corporate money to state, local and federal officials. In March 1990, prosecutors claim Dye and Wickett opened a bank account in the name of the company, but within months had the company’s name scrubbed from the account’s checks.

     And it's kinda sexy in that every politician they touches (including our own) became hookers.

March 14 - Rare personal note: I finally have a daughter. She's a keeper.

March 13 - Oh yeah, why didn't WE think of that?

The government has new rules for preventing food poisoning in fresh-cut produce, but companies don't have to follow them.

Fruit and vegetable-related outbreaks of food poisoning are on the rise and in recent months have struck in spinach, tomatoes, lettuce and cantaloupes.

In the new, voluntary rules, announced Monday by the Food and Drug Administration, fruit and vegetable processors are urged to adopt food safety plans similar to those in the meat industry.

     Oh, make it voluntary.  That's a great idea. 
     We have got to get rid of these guys before they kill us all.  I'm serious.  They're trying hard as they can. 

March 13 - Okay, here’s what you do – you scamper on down to the election filing office of your city, county, school board, or state and see who PBS&J PAC has given “campaign donations” to. 
     If it’s from that PBS&J PAC, the Florida authorities have determined that they are illegal contributions.  The formerly happy recipients must either return them or give them to the United States Treasury.   

The charges, filed last week, follow a $36.6 million embezzlement at the company that lasted about a dozen years. Three ex-employees pleaded guilty last fall and are awaiting sentencing.

One of the three, former manager Maria M. Garcia first alerted authorities to the alleged campaign-contribution scheme. Her Fort Lauderdale attorney, Benson Weintraub, said his client also filed a complaint with the Federal Elections Commission.

A FEC spokesman declined to comment. But FEC regulations state a recipient of illegal campaign contributions may return the money or give it to the U.S. Treasury.

     You think the Branch Davidian compound was something, huh?  Just wait until the Feds come to get Andy’s kickbacks. Andy thinks kickbacks are his entitlement. 

March 13 - The frightening part of democracy is that one of these two guys has to win.

Gary Gates – who won a settlement from Lamar Consolidated School District after the district took action that resulted in the seizure of Gates’ children – has filed to run for the district’s board of trustees.

Also in the race is Richard McCarter, who owns a technology consulting firm, a real estate development company and is treasurer of the Fort Bend County Republican Party.

     I know for a fact that the little schoolchildren of LCISD have done nothing to deserve either one of these guys.

March 13 - Matt Davies does a slam-dunk.

March 13 - Thanks to David for telling us about the coolest site ever for political junkies. 
     Thanks to OpenCongress Dot Org, we can follow every bill and and keep check on our Congressvarmints.

March 12 - A couple of the County Commissioner Boys are probably close to sweating bullets about now what with a bull’s-eye painted on their butts with PBS&J in the center.
     Here’s two pages from the indictment of PBS&J bigwig Richard Wickett in PDF format.  It includes the Texas connection. 
     You know, when you stand around with your hand out like our Commish Boys do all the damn time, somebody’s gonna drop a load of poop in it sooner or …. even sooner than that.
     One of the PBS&J indicted guys rolled

According to a statement issued by the U.S. Attorney's Office, Wickett and Dye had PBS&J employees claim false mileage expenses as a way of reimbursing them for contributions. The two also used employee bonuses to fund campaign contributions, prosecutors allege.

In addition, the U.S. Attorney's Office says the pair created a PBS&J bank account without the company's name or address to conceal the use of corporate funds to donate to candidates.

     Yep – a paw full of poop.

March 12 -

     And speaking of Tom DeLay, someone else has learned of his credibility as a source. 
     I mean, if you’re gonna lie to someone and make them look like a fool, maybe you should try to do it to someone on the other side.  Tom did it to John Fund, that smug little conservative twit from the Wall Street Journal.

     “He [DeLay] told me [Fund] he is about to sign on with CNN as a commentator. "I may be their only conservative on air, but someone has to do it.” 

     Tom DeLay will lie about what he’s wearing when he’s standing in front of you.  Less than 24 hours later, CNN rather stoutly denied. 

Said a CNN spokeswoman via email: "CNN is NOT hiring Tom DeLay."

     Rats!  I was hoping for The Most Trusted Name in Hot Tubs!

     But NO, that's not all.  Don't stop there!
Just to add speculation that he’s a finalist for the Nobel Biggest Damn Hypocrite Prize, Tom says Scooter Libby deserves a pardon

In the celebrated case of Mr. Lewis Libby, the prosecution pulled out one of its oldest and most shop-worn tricks. That is: setting up multiple perjury and obstruction of justice traps into which government officials, placed under extraordinary investigatory pressure, might fall.

      However, when it was Bill Clinton who lied, Tom was quoted in The Washington Post on October 9, 1998 …. 

"No man is above the law, and no man is below the law. That's the principle that we all hold very dear in this country," DeLay said. "The president has many responsibilities and many privileges. His chief responsibility is to uphold the laws of this land. He does not have the privilege to break the law."

     I think it's interesting that the comment section at Tom's website are not all that adoring, especially since you have to pay $52 and be approved to post.  . 
     As Ben Sargent, a wise political observer indeed, said back in 2005 ----

March 12 - There’s something about being around Tom DeLay that seems to breed the need to hire writ twits.  Mike Scanlon, DeLay’s former aide, confidant, and golfing buddy, is back in the news and he’s courthouse bound. 

While he awaits sentencing for his role in the Jack Abramoff scandal, Michael Scanlon is fighting another court battle -- on the home front.

In papers filed in Montgomery County last fall, the former Tom DeLay staffer-turned-mega-lobbyist is suing his ex-wife for $2 million plus all the money in their son's educational trust, claiming she and her new husband spent funds meant for the 8-year-old boy.

     Hey, at least coming to court gets him out of the jailhouse for a few hours!  And, entertaining themselves is what being a friend of Tom DeLay’s is all about.

March 9 - I have a proposal.  It’s modest. 
     Texas has long been an ATM Machine for Presidential candidates.   Hillary will be here next week.  Edwards is here now.  Barack just left. 
     They come, make a pit stop, take our money and then we don’t see them again.  Until they need more money.  They don’t campaign here.  They don’t spend money here.  They just make withdrawals without ever leaving a deposit.  
     The Texas Democratic Party gets the leftovers, the crumbs.  Local Democratic parties get diddle squat. 
     I suggest that we request a small deposit
     Texas Democrats say that grassroots politics are important.  If we believe that, truly believe it, we need to insure that the grassroots gets planted, fertilized, and plenty of sunshine.  We need to start winning local and statewide races.  We cannot do that when Presidential candidates take without giving. 
     We have watched our political money flow out of Texas at an alarming rate and then find ourselves wondering why we lost this State in the first place.
     My proposal: that every Presidential candidate leave 5% of what they raise in Texas to the Texas Democratic Party.  Leave 5% on the table as a tip.  The Texas Democratic Party would then use that money for Get Out The Vote efforts in Texas. 
     GOTV efforts help Democrats from the Courthouse to the White House. That 5% would not only help the Presidential candidate who left it here, it would help rebuild the Texas Democratic Party by electing Democratic constables, congressmen, judges, district attorneys, and sheriffs.
     Or, in the alternative, that for every fundraiser they have for themselves in Texas, they also do a fundraiser for the Texas Democratic Party. 
     It’s a modest proposal.  But it's a good one.

March 9 - Poor Ole Newt.  He's such a jerk. 

Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich was having an extramarital affair even as he led the charge against President Clinton over the Monica Lewinsky affair, he acknowledged in an interview with a conservative Christian group.

     And then he says ...

Gingrich argued in the interview, however, that he should not be viewed as a hypocrite for pursuing Clinton's infidelity.

     So, Gingrich thinks it's okay to lie unless you're under oath.  Kinda like the President we have now. 

March 9 - I wonder which aide will be the fall guy for this one.

Slapped even by GOP allies, the Bush administration is beating an abrupt retreat on eight federal prosecutors it fired and then publicly pilloried.

Just hours after Attorney General Alberto Gonzales dismissed the hubbub as an "overblown personnel matter," a Republican senator Thursday mused that Gonzales might soon suffer the same fate as the canned U.S. attorneys.

     and then ....

There would be no need for subpoenas to compel testimony by five of Gonzales' aides involved in the firings, as the Democrats had threatened.

     To quote a great American poet, CCR....

I see the bad moon arising.
I see trouble on the way.
I see earthquakes and lightnin.
I see bad times today.

March 8 - Well, well, well...
     We knew it was coming, and now it's here.  The Department of Justice is all over one of our county commissioner's favorite "donors." 

R. Alexander Acosta, United States Attorney for the Southern District of Florida, and Jonathan I. Solomon, Special Agent in Charge, Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), Miami Field Division, announced that defendants, Richard A. Wickett, and H. Michael Dye were charged with violations resulting from a long-term scheme to violate campaign finance laws during their employment with PBS&J Corporation (“PBS&J”).

     I don't have a link to the press release yet, but I'll post it as soon as I get it. Here we go!  And here's the press release from the DOJ. I am delighted that somebody is finally getting serious about violations of campaign finance. 
     And if our county commissioners have a lick of sense, they'll return the money.  But, their greed overrides their good sense and they're gonna end up in the middle of this whirlwind and claim they didn't see it a'comin' across the prairie.
     Hey, DOJ!  Lookie here!  I have all the campaign finance reports.  Lookie here!

March 8 - Okay, so you know you might have a gambling problem if you place bets on Bush pardoning Libby

Meanwhile, the online futures exchange has offered Libby pardon futures.

“There’s good interest in the market already,” John Delaney, the Intrade chief executive, said by telephone from Dublin. He said traders so far had collectively predicted a 23 percent chance of a pardon by the end of 2007 and 63 percent by the end of President Bush’s term.

     Good grief, 63%?  That’s a steal.  Bush NOT pardoning Libby has about the same odds as Bush winning the Nobel Peace Prize. 

March 8 - Our friend Deb is keeping tabs on slick Republicans.
     She’s having to use a database. 
     They are numerous.
     My Grandpa used to say of a local politician, “He’s so crooked that if he swallowed a nail, he’d poop a corkscrew.”  Seems to fit in this case. 

Nevada Gov. Jim Gibbons, while serving in the U.S. House, helped longtime friend Warren Trepp secure a secret $100 million defense contract, according to court documents filed this week by Trepp's former business partner.

If true, Trepp's dealings with the Defense Department, which have come under federal scrutiny, were far greater than what previously has been reported. The FBI is investigating whether Gibbons as a congressman received unreported gifts from the wealthy defense contractor and campaign contributor.

     The contract was out of the “black budget” – money that can be “handed out without a bidding process and without a full explanation to the public.”
     So, our fighting men and women did without proper equipment so Republican Congressmen could live the Tom DeLay lifestyle!
     There’s a real special place in hell for these guys.

March 8 - At last:  a reason for living.
     The Washington Post, a place where a sense of humor is scarce as donkey manure in a Sweetwater garage, has broken the sixth seal and given us …..

We want you to make a diorama of a famous occurrence or scene. It can be a historic or current event, or it can be a nod to pop culture. The one rule is that all the characters in the diorama must be played by Peeps.

(Our ideas? "The Peeple v. Larry Flynt." Or Penelopeep Cruz in "Volver." Or a scene from MTV's "Peep My Ride.")

     I’m at work on my masterpiece, “Haven’t Heard a Peep Out of Scooter Libby.”
     Or there’s “Clarence Thomas and Antonin Scalia: Two Peeps in a Pod”
     Or “And Peeps Unto You Also.” 
     Go ahead, feel free to steal my ideas.  I’ll buy the peeps and then eat them all.  Or do some more scientific peep research.  (This is worth a look.)

Camping one weekend we forgot to bring marshmallows to roast over the fire, since it was Easter we had the mandatory supply of Peeps. I thought they're marshmallow aren't they,  so why not use them as a substitute?   You have to be careful because the sugar can catch on fire quickly, but I have to tell you they're better than roasted marshmallows any day!   And the best way to get rid of them also.



This probably won't help you much but, there was an "art" exhibit in the vacant windows of a building at the corner of Connecticut Avenue and S Street, NW in DC a few years ago which featured Peeps in all their glory.  It was rather amazing; but, of course, it was "ephemeral" due to the nature of the substances used in the display.  I'm not kidding:  it was a HOOT to walk by there looking at the sheer creativity of the chicks and RABBITS made out of, essentially, merengue.  Too much fun.


March 8 - If you have time for some interesting reading, Denis Collins is writing about the Libby trial at the Huffington Post.  It's an insider's look at the jury process. 
     And for those of you following the continuing saga of elective government in Roseland, Indiana, our friend Kathy brings us news of the Snyders.

ROSELAND -- Clerk-treasurer Cheryl Gridley has closed her office until April 9 in the latest battle over authority in Roseland.

Furthermore, she has named Dorothy Snyder, former council member, as her chief deputy and authorized her to conduct town business in the interim.

"She can't do that," responded Ted Penn, vice president of the Roseland Town Council. He accused Gridley of dereliction of duty.

March 6 - Three things: 
     Number 1:  Scooter Libby is a  guilty man.
     Number 2:  Senator John Cornyn is an idiot.   
     Number 3:  Anyone who ever for one second doubted either of those things is a wink short of a proper flirt. 

     John Cornyn is so slick that he can’t keep his socks up, but he’s dumber than bean dip.  Check out this comment he made about the Justice Department firing all the US Attorneys who were conducting investigations or who wouldn’t kowtow to Congressional pressure. 

For now, Cornyn's only public comments on the issue were to The Post's Dan Eggen for a Jan. 19 story: "I find it unusual that some of my colleagues are critical of replacing Bush appointees."

     Duh, Sheriff Sarcastic, because they will be replaced by dishonest Bush appointees.  Good grief, Cornyn, you make us miss Tom DeLay’s mouth. 

Cornyn is an idiot, alright.

And he says a lot of stupid things, but is avoiding this one like the plague?

Just thinking, as a Texas State Attorney General, Texas Supreme court, would he really put himself on the line for defending DoJ?  Wilson and Domenici both admitted to contacting Iglesias and he knows that's not right or at least has an appearance of not being right. And as an administration defender he'd be there and say more stupid stuff if he could make a difference.  My guess is he's done his homework and knows this is going to be ugly and wants no part of it.

This administration talks about be loyalty, but have no clue of what that is. I'd rather be in a snake pit than with this group. 

When "Bush/Rove comes to shove", it's going to be someone else's fault!  If I were Gonzalez or McNulty I'd be more than a little bit afraid.


March 6 - Ann Telnaes does a slam dunk --

--- and she even does it in my color scheme.

March 5 - I've been that mad before.

Instead of slowing down after being shot with a tranquilizer dart, a moose charged a hovering helicopter used by a wildlife biologist, damaging the aircraft's tail rotor and forcing it to the ground.

Neither the pilot nor the biologist was injured, but the moose was maimed by the spinning rotor and had to be euthanized, wildlife officials said.

     Thank goodness they didn't euthanize me.  They just threw chocolate at me and took cover until I took a nap.
     You might want to remember that in case I ever get mad at you.

March 5 - As our friend Deb says, “They must be desperate. I didn't expect this until next summer/fall.”
     Neither did I.

     Armed with fresh intelligence, the CIA is moving additional man power and equipment into Pakistan in the effort to find Osama bin Laden and his deputy Ayman al Zawahri, U.S. officials tell ABC News.

     There must be more bad news on the way that they want to distract us from.  They’ve probably had to remind Bush who Osama is.


My friend Paul asked yesterday...

How is it that Al-Qaeda got closer to "Dick" Cheney by accident than we ever got to Osama bin Laden on purpose?

Some might think that explains the new hunt for Osama-bin-Voldemort. 

I think they're trying to gin up some notion that Barack Hussein Obama is the link between Saddam Hussein and Osama-bin-Hidin'

Don A.

March 5 - UPDATE:  Here's their written statement.

You know what stinks worse than the underside of a saddle?  This deal.   

The firings of eight U.S. attorneys has put the heat on top Justice Department officials—and some GOP members of Congress. The unusual mass dismissals took place late last year, but the controversy escalated last week when David Iglesias, the former U.S. attorney in New Mexico, went public with a dramatic charge: that he had gotten phone calls from two unidentified GOP lawmakers in D.C. last October, pressing him to bring indictments in a high-profile corruption case involving a prominent local Democrat before the November election.

     Now, I want you to get a picture in your head of what would have happened if Bill Clinton had fired everyone who was investigating him or any Democrat.  Rush Limbaugh would have gone off his feed for a year.  Sean Hannity would have started bleeding from his eyeballs.  Robert Novak would have cursed and stormed off a CNN show in a snit with his hair fl … oh wait, he did that.   

     And while I’m in a foul mood anyway, let me say this, take that stoopid We Support Our Troops yellow ribbon off your damn car before I come over there and slap you upside the head. 
     While I will admit to seeing far fewer “W” stickers in Sugar Land, every Republican I know has one of those yellow ribbons on their car. 
     They support the troops about as well as a $2.00 bra on a 46DDD woman, which is none at all.
     As Paul Krugman said today, “And the Walter Reed scandal is another Hurricane Katrina: the moment when the administration's misgovernment became obvious to everyone.”
     Except to Republicans.  They are still oblivious.  They’ve all slipped a cog.

Do you think when Bush was in MBA school, maybe he got stuck in "Today's Opposite Day" mode and couldn't bust out? Y'know, Brownie does a heckuva job, Rumsfeld is going to serve until the end of his administration, and eight U.S. attorneys with uniformly excellent performance reviews are incompetent and must be fired?

The simpler explanation, of course, is that the eight attorneys did prosecute Republicans and did not speed up the railroading of Democrats. But I'd prefer to give Bush the benefit of the doubt and call him unhinged rather than nakedly corrupt.

Dr. Doyle in Nacogdoches

March 4 - She has an Adam’s apple, tortured hair, and can only wear one dress.  Bless her heart, Ann Coulter probably shouldn’t be making fun of how people look. 
     And what a wonderful Sunday School teacher the Godly Ann was to little children last week!
     However, let me say here and now that a bar of soap, a Brillo pad, two quarts of estrogen, fifty IQ points, and double cheeseburger would be a start.

March 4 - Breaking News from Fort Bend County:  Hooters Continue to Be Barrier to Justice.
     The fluffy white boys at the Courthouse have replaced the spot vacated by another good-ole-boy who got Governor Rick Perry’s appointment to the new District Judgeship.  The replacement as special master?  Another fluffy white boy with good-ole-boy connections.   

Walter Armatys has been appointed associate judge of Fort Bend County’s 328th District Court, Presiding Judge Ron Pope announced on Wednesday.

     It’s call the Good-Ole-Boy Full Employment Act.  Or, simply, Crock O' Crap. 
     Here’s how it works:  The District Judge Boys create new “assistant judge” jobs to give to their friends by claiming that they need assistant judges because they are so darned overworked.  Phew!  These 8 hour days … uh, well except for Fridays and, of course, long lunches on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and oh yeah, coming in late on Wednesday, and well, nobody is on time on Mondays … are, well, as the President says, it’s hard. 
     Then, when we get a new judgeship from the State Lege and they weezle their assistant judge appointee friends into that position, even though two far more qualified females were among the final three.
     So now we need a new assistant judge to fill the void left when the old one was promoted.  And who got the fickle finger of permanent employment and benefits pointed their way?  Another good-ole-boy. 
     So, out of 10 – count ‘um, ten – district judges and assistant judges, only 1 is female and she hears only family court matters. 
     It’s the Hooter Handicap, I’m tellin’ ya. 

March 4 - Well, this just show how progressive Texas is!
     There's a bill in the Ohio legislature right now to allow idiots to vote.  Hell, in Texas we allow them not only to vote, but to hold office.  In fact, I believe it's a requirement. 

March 3 - Our friend Jerry send this link with the comment, "It's too bad that Texas legislators are neither that creative nor bright."
     It's a Minnesota bill creating the position of poet laureate written in rhyming verse. 

March 2 - Poor Ole Tom DeLay has to be feeling the devil's breath singeing his patootie 'bout now.

Even though he's in prison, Jack Abramoff will continue to cooperate with prosecutors for the foreseeable future. A status conference originally scheduled for tomorrow, during which the judge would have set a date for Abramoff to be sentenced on bribery charges, has been postponed until June 5th.

     No wonder you can pre-order his book - the dude needs the money.

March 1 - Quick, go look!  It's a rare day that you see "dry air" in a description of Gulf Coast Texas. 

The weather service said the warning will be in effect beginning at 10 a.m., when it predicts unseasonably dry air will work its way into the region.

     Dry air.  We've got fully grown children here who've never seen that before.

March 1 - You know what’s gotta be harder than Chinese algebra?  Writing a guest editorial in the newspaper calling your detractors both Marxists (and fellow travelers) and McCarthyites in the same damn essay.  No, seriously, some guy in Waco did it. And, bless his heart, I don’t think he “gets” the irony of it. 

When the Soviet Union collapsed, American Marxists, socialists and other assorted fellow-travelers who had long supported the Soviets found themselves aimlessly adrift with no place to hang their ideological hats.

Many of them found a new home in the environmental movement, which they saw as a new means to an old end.

And then ….

As unlikely as that may be, there most certainly is a type of environmental McCarthyism already at work.

     I mean, we should give some type of award for that!  That’s impressive work. 
     But, he doesn’t stop there.  No, sireee, this guy is a professional!  He thinks scientists are comparing him to “Holocaust deniers” at “Nuremburg-style trials.”  He’s hogging all the paranoia.
     He never quite explains why Marxists morphed into environmentalists, but it probably has something to do with pure meanness or maybe that “ists” thing on the end of their names.  I think he just wanted to use the watermelon analogy, which even I admit was kinda cute.  (You just gotta read the whole editorial.)

     It could only happen in Waco.  Remind me someday to tell you the story of why I believe that Waco is a part of Texas only by geographical accident.
     Thanks, Sandy, for the heads-up. 

Hi, Susan.  That editorial reminded me of the classy guy down in Katy who is now doing pig races because a mosque is being built on the adjacent land.  Of course they're all in good fun & not meant to offend anyone...... geez louise!   I didn't remember seeing a link, so here it is 

Make sure you watch the video so you can see how disrespectful these people are!  I can just imagine the stink  if someone did something similarly offensive to the good WASPS of that city.   

Keep up the good work!  

Stephanie up in Arlington

Hi, Susan - I'm a little late commenting on David Anderson's editorial in the Waco Trib - we got that governor thing going on here in Kentucky, dontcha know - but I did want to take just a moment to point out Mr. Anderson's lack of knowledge of political history:
Anderson actually made laugh with this: "Some even brought the kind of fascism so often associated with Marxist regimes."
It's not possible to have fascism in a Marxist regime. One (fascism) is a rightist political philosophy, and the other is leftist.
How soon we forget, and after the fall of only one evil empire...
Rich Miles
Shelbyville KY

March 1 - Okay, here's the deal - I'm carrying-over the post from yesterday about our county commissioners and their crooked friends at PBS&J because I think the commissioners should voluntarily return that money.
     The commissioners listed the contributions as being from PBS&J PAC and now we know that was a scam PAC.  It is against Texas law to accept corporate contributions, so if they keep the money they are openly violating Texas law. 
     Check the whole story below.

February 28 - There’s big news in the political kickback boondoggle we amusingly call “campaign contributions.”
     Most of you remember the oddity of several of our county commissioners taking contributions from embattled PBS&J, a Florida engineering company that was found to be overcharging taxpayers for government contracts.
     Amusingly, PBS&J also claimed to give some of our county commissioners political contributions that the commissioners didn’t report on their required contribution reports.  Commissioners claim they never got the money

      However, at least three commissioners admit receiving money from the PBS&J PAC in July of last year – County Judge Bob Hebert $2,500; Commissioner Andy Meyers $2,000; and Commissioner Tom Stavinoha $800.
      Recent reports out of Florida indicate that the PBS&J PAC was a sham, at corporate, employee and customer expense. 

Licata opened secret bank accounts and created what auditors describe as a phantom political action committee, "PBSJ PAC." The signatory on the secret accounts was DeLoach, who over two years transferred in millions of dollars from the medical benefits account.

     Our commissioners list “PBSJ PAC” as the donor of the hunks ’o cash they received. That, for the deaf, dumb, and blind, would be the same PAC that was illegal. 
     And later on in the same story --- 

In addition to bilking their fellow employees, DeLoach, Garcia and Licata embezzled from clients, including Florida taxpayers. To make up what they were taking out the back door, they created bogus expenses and billed them to clients using general and administrative (G&A) accounts, which charge for project management, administration and overhead. Their manipulation of G&A accounts inflated overhead rates for government contracts.

      If our county commissioners don’t pony-up those donations and return them quicker than a hiccup, they better know it will be a campaign issue bigger than their greedy egos.   

The biggest question mark that remains for PBS&J, its employees and clients is an ongoing FBI investigation into illegal campaign contributions at the firm that was sparked by the embezzlement probe.

      So, the investigation is ongoing. 
     Lookie, lookie, Mr. FBI person, lookie over here: I have all the reports, going back years.


Welcome to the website formerly known as The World's Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc.

My name is Susan DuQuesnay Bankston.
I live in Richmond, Texas, in heart of Tom DeLay's old district.  It's crazy here.  No, seriously, it's triple z crazzzy.

I used to be an independent voter, but that all changed when I got to know a few local Republicans.  They are meaner than 10 acres of snakes and have the ethical compass of a bank robber. 

So, I decided that they could just Kiss My Big Blue Butt.

A lot of what I post here has to do with local politics, but you probably have the same folks in your local government.

This ain't a blog.  Blogs are way too trendy for me.  I've been doing this since 1992, so I'm used to it even if you ain't. 

Email me and I'll find a place to put it if I like it.