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Bob
Hebert
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Meyers
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June 29 -
Why you should
watch The Daily Show instead of Fox News.
Fox makes you stoopid.
We prove, once again, that reality has a strong liberal
bias.
June 29 -
There is only one thing better than politics, and that's
baseball. And, there's only a handful of things
better than last night.
A good
man did a great thing. Craig Biggio, who has
been a rare gift to the city of Houston, reached the
3,000 hits mark last night. Even making #3,000, he
pumps it and speeds for a double. Good all over
him!
You can share in the pure, unadulterated, roll in the
mud and sing off key at the top of your lungs joy
right here.
June 28 -
Damn, I flat out love Texas.
As you've been hearing, we're trying to move Noah's
record here in Texas. We have 4 seasons here:
hurricane, drought, flood, and hotter than a two dollar
pistol.
We've learned to make the best of things.
This gives a whole new meaning
to roadkill.
This is Highway 56 in Valley Mills, Texas. And
that's Bubba, Joe Bob, Joe Bob Junior, and Dewayne.
Susan,
My friend Donna says the boys are camped out on
the highway right in front of her mother's
house.
Mike
|
June 28 -
We get email from Earl.
June 28 -
Poor Shelley Sekula-Gibbs. No, seriously, you gotta
feel a little bit sorry for the gal. She has to have
the worst sense of timing known to mankind.
Shelley announced yesterday that
she’s officially a candidate for CD 22. Yep, the
same day Tom DeLay took center stage with glorifying
statements about how everyone wanted him to lead this
country, but we’ve had to settle for less. Damn,
girl. Not smart.
This is the same gal (okay, so I cannot bring
myself to call her a woman) who sent out a mass email
saying that Nick Lampson “is acting like a liberal
again” while Nick Lampson was in intensive care
recovering from heart surgery.
And it’s the same gal who told reporters that she was
going to solve the world’s problems while Congress was
in recess.
Oh well, on the upside, she had the hyphen legally
removed from her name. I bet that was painful! To be
honest, she should have had the large empty hole removed
from her brain instead.
June 27 -
BREAKING AGAIN:
The fat lady isn't even clearing her throat.
Calling it a "tortured decision," Travis County District
Attorney Ronnie Earle will seek a rehearing on the DeLay
decision.
Because of the important policy considerations involved
in protecting the public from felony criminal
conspiracies of all kinds, we will seek a rehearing of
this matter before the Court.
According to the
Quorum Report,
(subscription only) Earle likens the decision to making
it legal to "agree to conceal and destroy bank records
because that felony crime is in the Finance Code," among
other examples.
Susan,
To hear Tom DeLay tell it,
this picayune ruling is a Get Out of Jail Free
Card--and the South won the Civil War because
"we made the Yankees take us back."
Earl
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June 27 -
BREAKING. The Austin American Statesman reports
that by a 5-4 decision, the Texas Supremes have
upheld Judge Pat Priest's decision on the dismissal
of one of the felony charges against Tom DeLay.
In the 5-4 decision, the court affirmed Judge Pat
Priest’s decision to throw out an indictment accusing
DeLay and his associates, Jim Ellis and John Colyandro,
of conspiring to violate state election laws. The Sugar
Land Republican, who retired from Congress in 2006
because of the indictments arising from the 2002
elections, still faces a charge of conspiring to launder
corporate money into campaign donations.
The fat lady ain't singing yet.
Okay, so now I have a few
minutes to post something about this.
Although you'd never know it to hear
DeLay go stark raving freekin' wacko about it, this
was not the substantive charge. The big charges
still stand.
Additionally, he was not "cleared" in any manner
whatsoever. This is simply five Republican judges
out of nine said that what DeLay did was not a
conspiracy. What's shocking about this is that
four Republican judges actually ruled against him.
By the way, if I hear DeLay whine about his legal fees
one more time, I'm gonna start billing his legal team
for earplugs. DeLay sure didn't worry about all
the money he was costing the taxpayers when he was on
those fancy pants golf vacations, now did he?
June 27 -
Okay, so here’s the deal. A
construction company sent their writ twit to
commissioner’s court yesterday to let the public know
that
the low bidder did not get the contract on the new jail.
Attorney Greg Travis told court
members on Tuesday that his client, Cornerstone
Detention Products Inc. of Tanner, Ala., submitted a
low bid of $6.63 million to construct the jail cells.
However, he said he has been informed that San Antonio
Contractor CCC Group, which
submitted the high bid of $6.98 million for the work,
is being awarded the contract.
Oh, shock and awe! You mean
commissioners played favorites with vendors to the
county? Well, I’ll be a toad frog on a pool table.
That’s just shocking, shocking I tell you.
Mr. Travis, perhaps your client was a tad cheapo with
the kickbacks, oops, I meant to say campaign
contributions. This stuff happens all the time.
Here’s how it works: County Judge Bob Hebert likes
money - $5,000 per campaign reporting period is about
enough to cause him to like you. Commissioner Andy
Meyers generally gets a $2,500 cut, errr… donation. Tom
Stavinoha gets about a grand, but you have to take him
tickets to the ballgame and you’ll get the bill for his
livestock purchases at the county fair so your
“contribution” doesn’t show up on his campaign report.
James Patterson wants about a grand and you have to show
up to donate to his favorite charity when he’s the
auctioneer.
I know that sounds like a lot of money, but you can
just add it in to your overall costs and pass it along
to the taxpayers. That way, nobody gets hurt. Well,
you know, except the taxpayers and they’re in the dark
because county commissioners hide their campaign finance
reports.
I’ve got 15 years of records to that show how this
game is played. Building a big project like the jail
requires enough kickbacks …. rats, I meant to say
campaign contributions …. to give our county
commissioners blue butt. But, sadly, not the good kind
of blue butt.
Good on Mr. Travis’ clients for having the guts to
stand up and say something. I like those guys.
On a
similar note, Alfredo sent us a story about
Florida politicians who know how to stay bought!
June 27 -
I have a question.
I thought conservatives were all about family
values and giving parents control of their children. At
least that’s what they say.
Okay, so the conservative Supremes rule that a
school principal can discipline a child for doing
something perfectly legal off school grounds and not at
a school function. That means that if your child does
something legal in your backyard with your full
permission, even with you standing beside him or her,
the high school principal can up and decide willy-nilly
that he/she is offended and suspend your child from
school.
Yo, conservatives! Listen up. You people scare
me.
June 27 -
Shame on
Chris Matthews (links to YouTube) for exploiting a
woman with obvious mental health problems yesterday.
Watching poor Ann Coulter, who wears a cocktail
dress everywhere she goes, flip her hair and smirk at an
accomplished woman, was painful.
It’s obvious that Ann Coulter is a woman who has
never loved or been loved.
Bless Anne's heart!
It's just not fair that all the poor woman has
to wear is that leather cocktail dress...summer,
winter, night or day. Between the dress, the
God talk, and that cunning little crucifix on
her necklace, Anne so reminds me of a cross
between Betty Page and Mother Theresa.
When you act like you've been raised by fire
ants, I guess the fashion sense and the common
sense are both absent.
Kate
Waxahachie, Texas
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June 26
-
I’m not saying that it’s a Good-Ole-Boy Return of the
Son of Lollapalooza or anything, but … well, wait,
that’s exactly what I’m saying.
In a move just like giving enormous pay raises to
their friends, while
hiding it behind modest pay raises for law enforcement,
I just scanned this out of yesterday’s Herald Whatever.
Read the first paragraph. Why
does the county need to rent the entire first floor of a
medical building? And even if they need more space,
which they do not, why would they pick a building where
there is never any place to park? I quit going to a
doctor in that building simply because I could never
find a parking place.
There is a large strip center down the road for
rent double dirty cheap if they truly do need space.
And there’s plenty of parking there.
Why this building?
Come on, people, think.
Hi Susan:
The county rents a house from Vacek for $4000 per
month for one or two people so why not a whole floor
of a building with no parking for who knows how much
$$$$ for a few folks .... it's just $$$$$$
DW
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June 26 -
Sally Quinn makes a case that Darth Cheney (see
below why I can't call him Dick
anymore) should resign this summer when he's scheduled
to have the battery changed in his pacemaker.
The big question right now among Republicans is how
to remove Vice President Cheney from office. Even
before this week's blockbuster series in The Post,
discontent in Republican ranks was rising.
As the reputed architect of the war in Iraq, Cheney
is viewed as toxic, and as the administration's
leading proponent of an attack on Iran, he is seen as
dangerous. As long as he remains vice president,
according to this thinking, he has the potential to
drag down every member of the party -- including the
presidential nominee -- in next year's elections.
Miss Sally, who are you gonna
get to go tell him that he has to resign? He ain't
gonna go willingly. Look, we've seen what the man
can do with a shotgun. It's going to take somebody
on a suicide mission to tell him to pack his bags.
Hummm ... now that I think about it, I do have a few
messenger suggestions.
Hi Susan,
I think Ms. Quinn
might be the harbinger of a 'plot' to have
Darth resign, spend more time with his new
grandchild, and have someone electable step
in. It's so very cunning. I believe that
dreadful Fred Thompson is being touted, but
I'm sure you're way up on that already!!!!
Sybil in NM
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June 25 -
If county commissioners are unwilling to disclose what
pay raises they are considering for county employees,
then you can bet your Roy Rogers lunchbox that some
commissioner’s good-ole-boy is getting an undeserved
pay raise.
These guys keep right on amazing me with their
arrogance of Republicanism attitude ...
J.C. Whitten, acting county human
resources director, said the item under consideration
involves an “interim adjustment” in pay, involving
seven pay periods covering the remainder of the
current fiscal year. [and then….]
Beyond that, Whitten declined to
provide specific details of what compensation changes
are to be contemplated, saying, “I’d rather not go
into that until it’s approved.”
No, no, no, no, no. This is
still a democracy, even though you can’t tell it by
watching the fluffy white boys scratch each other’s
backs in secret. If you’re going to pass something at a
meeting, you have to let the public know what you’re
voting on in advance so they can call you on the phone
and holler, “Are you freekin’ nuts or are you drunk
again?”
Not that it will do any good. I once had
Commissioner Tom Stavinoha’s solemn promise not to vote
on something until the people had more input. His
solemn on this grandmother’s grave promise. Then he
went to the meeting and Judge Bob Hebert intimidated him
by using three syllable words and old Tom folded like a
cheap suitcase at the train station.
But, the public has a constitutional right to know
what’s fixing to happen so they can least be lied to all
properly.
I knew somebody was getting a raise they didn't
deserves and, sure 'nuff, it looks like some folks in JC
Whitten's Human Resources department are getting the
biggest raises. I'll bet you two to one that
they're ladies. Like I've said before, getting
dates for JC has cost this county more than any damn
bridge to nowhere.
It's a common trick. Give law enforcement a
little bitty raise than sneak in enormous raises for a
few of your friends. I've plowed this field before.
Plus, I'm real nervous about JC Whitten still being the
acting Human Resources director. I know how JC
acts. This is a lawsuit just waiting to happen.
June 24 -
We get some educational email from Patrick.
Susan,
This
will give you your blog rating for your site.
You check out some of your favorites as well.
I don't think you should tell your mom about
this, but I think you'll be very surprised at
your rating.
Patrick
Dear Patrick -
Well, damn, The Big Ass Fan Company and Vice
President Dick Cheney got me an R rating.
Susan
Dick Cheney. Dick Cheney. Dick
Cheney. Dick Cheney. Dick Cheney
tortures people with his Big Ass Fan.
Well, that should do it.
|
June 24 -
Okay, would somebody please explain to me why
I'm reading about this in the Los Angles Times
instead of the Houston Chronicle or Galveston Daily
News.
GALVESTON, TEXAS — Leaders of this fast-eroding barrier
island — the scene of the deadliest hurricane in
American history — are about to approve nearly 4,000 new
homes and two midrise hotels despite geologists'
warnings that the massive development would sever a
ridge that serves as the island's natural storm shield.
My parents used to have
waterfront property near Baycliff on Second Street.
Think about it.
Anyone who spent 7 hours to go 16 miles during the last
hurricane evacuation, as I did, knows that putting more
people in Galveston may not the be brightest idea.
However, in gross and disgusting contrast to not
hearing about that story around here, the
Houston Chronicle's front page today headlined this
story:
Shortly after Hurricane
Rita sent 3.6 million Texans rushing to the state's
highways, Gov. Rick Perry called a task force together
to find better ways to handle a mandatory evacuation
and avoid the chaotic traffic jams that became the
storm's hallmark.
While public sessions
were held so Texans could vent frustrations about
gridlock and fuel-less gas stations, another meeting
behind closed doors took place between state disaster
officials and executives of some of the biggest names
in the industry: Shell, Citgo, Chevron, Valero,
ConocoPhillips, Exxon Mobil and Marathon.
Oh yeah, I really trust those behind closed doors
meetings with state officials and oil companies.
Good Lord, there ought to be laws of physics involved
for even letting those two groups to meet anywhere.
I'll bet my best pair of pink boots that they sent us a
bill for the damn doors, somebody got a kickback and
somebody else got free season passes to the Dallas
Cowboy home games.
I lived through
Carla, Honey. And I know this county's levee
system is far too low. Hurricane comes - me go.
It was in the
Houston Chronicle. Just buried somewhere, I
don't remember. I can read and do. That's why I
am so dangerous. I am also an old surfer(waves)
and am very familiar with that part of
Galveston.
Along with the danger to the west end. Offats
Bayou, That stretch of water along 61st street
is also a danger zone. The Island could be cut
there by Cat3 storm. But why worry, Developers
are allowed to build houses where just as much
water as the Gulf of Mexico flows, when it
rains. Big Business is more important than
logic, reason and responsibility. Isn't it
Amazing that that those stupid old Greeks
actually taught Logic in their schools.
Cheers,
Robin
|
June 23 - OH WOW!
The Big Ass Fan Tee-Shirt contest
is over and Scott is the winner. In more ways than
one.
After Scott bid $100, he emailed me saying that he was
going out of town and he'd put a $100 check to the USO
in the mail to me before he left. He said that
even if he lost, to go ahead and send the $100 check to
the USO because "they can use the money." Heckuva
guy, huh?
Oh, it gets better.
Lo and behold, this morning, I get this letter in the
mail from Scott. You know the drill - click on the
little one to get the big one.
Enclosed was a personal check
made out to the USO for $500. Five hundred
dollars! Yes!
Ya know, some days it's worth getting out of bed to
blog. Democrats are the best folks in the world
and I want to thank Scott for helping me prove it.
Scott lives in Bellingham, Washington, but I ain't
giving you his last name because I don't want you
bothering him.
A hug to the good folks at the
Big Ass Fan Company
for the shirts, and to Scott for helping to make the
life a soldier a little easier.
And by the way, even Momma says that you can say the A
word if it raises $500 for the USO.
June 22 -
Oh please, Sweet Jesus, don't let him touch anything.
Bush at the nuclear power
station in Alaska. Dude, I wouldn't even let him
lean back in that chair.
From Dave ---
|
June 22 -
Our friend David sent us some pictures that are worth a
thousand words. They speak of the condition of the
Republican Party ---
Yes, those are Shelley Sekula
Gibbs signs after a tractor mower ran them over in the
right of way.
June 22 -
Okay, this doesn't have anything to do with politics,
but it does have something to do with philosophy and the
nature of things.
So I know a lot of weird stuff happens in Texas, but
this could only happen in Aladamnbama. There
is no love like that of a man and his pickup truck.
A Huntsville man found a trip to the gas pump to be more
than just painful to his wallet Wednesday afternoon.
Dwight Clark was in the parking lot of Medical Arts
Pharmacy apparently trying to clear some gunk from
around the opening to his gas tank with his finger
when it became stuck, said Huntsville Fire & Rescue
Capt. Nolen Locke.
After folks at the pharmacy on Whitesburg Drive
couldn't help with his dilemma, Huntsville Fire &
Rescue, the Madison County Rescue Squad and HEMSI were
called.
"His finger went in past the knuckle and was
stuck," Locke said. "People had sprayed WD40 all over,
but that didn't work."
Without cutting the metal, Locke said they tried
several ways to free Clark because he didn't want them
damage this truck.
Okay,
first of all, I am not even going to comment on why
Bubbas all over the South just gotta stick their fingers
in things. Testosterone forbids he should get a
stick or something.
I will, however, ask why men spray WD40 on everything.
Dewayne over at Gripey Ralph's Transmission Repair
Company once sprayed WD40 on a stuck zipper.
Tragically, he did not remove his pants first and did
not notice that Ralph's blow torch was a tad too close
by .... the rest, as they say, can be read in the
divorce papers because Debi Sue decided that maybe
Dewayne wasn't such a good breeder after all.
Okay, so here's this guy standing around with his
finger stuck in the gas tank of his pick up which has to
be at least mildly embarrassing. He has had to
call out every emergency vehicle in town. He has
been sprayed with various chemicals, and you know it's
gotta be hot enough to fry a steak on his bald spot, but
noooo..... don't damage his pickup. Cut off his
arm first, dammit.
Lordy, Lordy, I love Bubbas.
June 22 -
Talk about arrogance in a box with a
bow on top! Vice President Dick Cheney has proven
himself
not to be a big fan of democracy.
For
four years, Vice President Dick Cheney has resisted
routine oversight of his office’s handling of
classified information, and when the National Archives
unit that monitors classification in the executive
branch objected, the vice president’s office suggested
abolishing the oversight unit, according to documents
released yesterday by a Democratic congressman.
Personally, I think the only
reason that Bush hasn’t been impeached is Cheney. I
think he did that whole shoot-your-friend-in-the-face
deal just to make us even more scared of him.
June 21 -
We get email from Earl and from Elaine ---
Hi Susan,
Here's a report on commercial
Rightspeak (Reichspeak?) Radio nationally.
Look at the Houston graph, then pop your eyes
back into their sockets. Dan Patrick's KSEV has
been carrying promos about how the other FOUR
Houston Rightspeak stations are firing their local
hosts and replacing them with cheaper syndicated
programming. Isn't loyalty wonderful?
I hear you had trouble finding
the filler plug for the kerosene on your new
computer.
Earl
Dear Earl,
Now you know why I got myself an
electric satellite radio, a shortwave radio, and a
scanner - I will do anything to avoid rightwing
radio.
I'll have you know that I parted
with some major bucks for this fancy-pants new
computer. Poo on kerosene, my friend, this
sucker is diesel powered!
Susan
Susan,
Saw this
and thought I'd share it with you since you have
so much experience with retired exterminators.
What the heck is it with these guys?
Maybe they were using the special Tom Delay Bug
Killer and Anti-Government Mix. Here - take a
lookie:
Story
Highlights ---
1.
Convicted tax evaders Ed and Elaine Brown are
barricaded in their compound
2.
The couple taunts police with references to 1992
Ruby Ridge shootout
3.
Tense neighbors in New Hampshire fear the
standoff could end violently
The Browns' home on an isolated dirt roads
includes a turret that offers a 360-degree view of
the property and a driveway that is sometimes
barricaded with SUVs.
Ed Brown, a retired exterminator, and his wife, a
dentist, have bragged that the compound is
self-sufficient and capable of running entirely on
solar, wind and geothermal energies.
Susan, I say we ban exterminators. Hasn't Tom
already proven they are a danger to
our environment?
Your Dam Yankee Friend in Spring,
Lorraine
Dear Lorriane,
Yep - that's the DeLay mix all right. Have
they robbed a bank yet or installed a hot tub?
Susan
|
June 21 -
The good folks over at South Texas Chisme (and, no, I
ain't gonna translate that for you
fools in Oak Point, Texas) are
asking
how mean is Governor Rick Perry?
An 84 year old Texas House cook was
forced to retire. Even though she worked for the state
more than 30 years, Texas retirement rules counted less
than 15. Grateful legislators changed that rule for her,
Perry vetoed it. How bloody mean is that!
Chisme explain that Perry was
playing cowboy with members of the Lege and the 84 year
old woman was an innocent bystander in a pistol whipping
contest.
I will you this - Rick Perry is meaner than ten acres
of snakes and so lowdown that you couldn't put a rug
under him.
He's also a little sissy boy who has retired honest women do
his fighting for him.
June 21 -
Just for fun, my friend Ann sent a great website to buy
stuff for your weird friends. You can make
political or philosophical statements with
swag from this joint.
Personally, I love the Dick Cheney notecards, the
Shakespearean insult mug, and anything Calvin and
Hobbes. You'll have fun looking around.
June 20 -
Okay, I think we're kinda online. I'm still having
trouble sending email but we can get that fixed in the
morning. I imagine I'll be a little shaky for a
few days what with having to learn new stuff. So,
if I don't answer your emails right away, it ain't
because I don't like you. At least not totally.
And, just to make for a perfect storm, I broke the
power cord on my laptop tonight.
A big giant thanks to
Dave for putting
up with my pacing all afternoon and evening.
June 20 -
I’m
gonna be honest with ya. My ‘puter machine is so old
that we had to carbon date it to figure out what was the
first operating system on it.
We think it was Windows 95. Seriously. A nerd who used
to live in my house says we could take it on the Antique
Road Show and have someone comment on how nice it looks
considering its age.
Over the years, I have added memory, another hard
drive, updated the operating system at least three
times, maybe four. This sucker is being held together
with duck tape and a prayer, and we’re edging close to
laying on of hands to keep it running.
I have a birthday this weekend and no, I do not
want to talk about it, except that I’m getting a brand
spankin’ new computer for my birthday.
We’ll probably start trying to install it
tomorrow. So, if I miss posting for a couple of days
because I’m trying to find all the drivers for all the
junk I have hooked up to this sucker and I’m busy
cussing and hollering because you can’t buy Frontpage
anymore and I love Frontpage and I’m too damn old to
learn another web program because when I learned to do
website construction, you had to do it in code and
there’s not room for new stuff in my head with all
outdated stuff filling it up and, yes, I’m a little
anxious about all this.
My techie says everything will go smoothly but I
don’t trust him because nothing ever goes smoothly with
me and electronics. Coke machines still steal my money.
I have a laptop to use if everything crashes.
However, I'm from Texas so my BIG ole desktop is my
favorite.
If you don't hear from me for a week, notify the proper
authorities. I don't know who'd that be, but you
can figure it out or something.
June 20 -
Okay, it has fallen on me to explain things to people
from foreign states.
Our Governor, Rick Perry, is missing a cog in his
thinker assembly. He's not in the full upright and
locked position, if you know what I mean. But,
don't make fun of us, because the last Governor we had
like that ended up in the White House. We're real
good at crazzzy in Texas.
The latest is that our Governor
vetoed a bill that nobody objected to - except for
one anonymous phone caller, that would save money and
improve health.
Gov. Rick Perry's veto of a ban on diesel-fueled
school buses idling unnecessarily stunned its
sponsors, partly because the change had widespread
support from school groups and hadn't previously drawn
an objection from Perry's office.
The veto, among 55 made public late last week, also
appears contradictory to a pitch by the Bush
administration to curb bus emissions exposing children
to fine particles that can trigger asthma attacks.
Hey,
there's a vacuum of leadership in the pro-asthma attack
caucus, and Rick Perry stepped up to fill that need, my
friends. You think it's easy being pro-asthma and
in favor of fuel wastes during these times? No, it
is not. But, Rick Perry doesn't just fall into
line like a .... well, a sane person.
The truth is that instead of saying, "Gee, I dunno, I
was in a veto signing mood that day," or "I used the
eenie, meenie, miney, mo method of veto determination,"
or "Oops, read the word idle, thought they were talking
about me and ....", our Governor is trying to explain
why he did this nutty thing using words like these....
In his veto message, the Republican governor states
that schools should focus on core functions, including
classroom instruction and extracurricular activities.
"If schools believe they should also regulate and
enforce school bus idling policies, I think they
should do so, not because it is mandated by the state,
but because they have chosen to do so as a matter of
policy decided on the local level," Perry states.
Good Lord,
the State mandates everything else in the schools.
Rick didn't think it should be up to local districts
whether or not kids could pray at school.
The spokes are missing from his wheel. That's why
he vetoed it. Just say it. For Pete Sake,
everyone knows he's nuts.
June 19 -
Well,
the Vatican has issued the Ten Commandments for driving
cars.
No,
seriously.
VATICAN CITY (Reuters) - Thou shall not drive under
the influence of alcohol. Thou shall respect speed
limits. Thou shall not consider a car an object of
personal glorification or use it as a place of sin.
The Vatican took a break from strictly theological
matters Tuesday to issue its own rules of the road, a
compendium of do's and don'ts on the moral aspects of
driving and motoring.
A 36-page document called "Guidelines for the
Pastoral Care of the Road" contains 10 Commandments
covering everything from road rage, respecting
pedestrians, keeping a car in good shape and avoiding
rude gestures while behind the wheel.
We can sum it up a little better in Texas, “Drive
Friendly, and no hanky panky in the backseat.”
Susan,
You know there used to be so many
Czech immigrants in Texas that it was called "the
third language of Texas" at one time. They asked an
old timer whether it wasn't difficult coming to a
new country where you didn't know the language, and
he replied: "Oh no! Most of us already spoke enough
German to get by." See, the Czechs tended to settle
near the Germans.
There's a story that a Czech from
the Old Country was visiting Texas in the late 1800s
and he was surprised to hear two boys speaking Czech
while he was riding a train. Well, he looks around
and sees two young BLACK boys sitting in a corner
chattering away in Czech. O.K., now I gotta 'splain
a coupla things to make the joke work. See, on the
frontier there weren't any orphanages, so orphans
tended to get adopted by whichever family was
handiest and willing. And there are two types of
Czechs, Bohemians and Moravians, with the Moravians
always complaining about being given the bum's rush
by the Bohemians. Now back to the story . . .
So our visitor walks up to the
two Black boys and says in wonderment in Czech, "Are
you boys Bohemians?" And they reply proudly, "NO!
We're MORAVIANS!"
Earl
Susan,
One thing that is being missed in this story, is
that if you have ever been in Italy and tried to
cross the street, and had a near miss by a car full
of nuns you would understand why he would put this
directive out.
Boston drivers are unpredictable, New Yorkers are
aggressive, Texas drivers – well more than one
little old blue hair has kept me from making an exit
off the interstate, then slowed down, not to mention
the “Pink Lights” at intersections, Quebec drivers
are also aggressive, but all pale in comparison to
the Italian Driver. In Italy Anarchy rules the
roads, you don’t even feel safe on the sidewalks in
Rome. If you think the old west was wild you
haven’t been near the streets in Italy.
Here in Vermont drivers will routinely stop to let
someone cross the road, they wave their hand across
and say, “go on, go on” and if we get 3 cars at a
stopsign we consider it a traffic jam.
Carol
PS. Hope things are drying out down there.
|
June 19 -
Just out of the clear blue,
just like that!, the good folks at the
 Big
Ass Fan Company sent me some of their tee-shirts to
auction off for charity around here.
They sell their swag to benefit two charities: disabled
vets and a home for
wayward donkeys, which, of course, is where I plan
to retire.
Last week, I made a comment on this site that I wanted
one of their tee-shirts, and they sent me a box of those
suckers.
They said I could use them for any charity I want to.
Tell ya what I'm gonna do. The guy who told me
about the Big Ass Fan Company gets a tee-shirt for his
favorite charity auction. Murdeen already gave me
a check made out to the American Cancer Society for her
shirt, which she says she's gonna wear if I wear mine
because mortification is an emotion to be shared.
But here's where you come in. I've got these
shirts in black and white, size large and extra-large,
and I'm gonna auction one off right here and now.
Here's the rules, because you gotta have rules.
You email me and tell me how much you're willing to pay
for this super cool tee-shirt.
You make the check out to the
USO, because that's my
next favorite charity, but you'll send the check to me,
and I will forward it to the USO so I know it got there.
I don't trust nobody. I have been disappointed by too
many politicians to trust anybody. Ain't that a
shame?
Or, you can donate online and send me a copy of the
email receipt. I'll mail you the shirt at my
expense.
The bidding starts at $15. I'll end this sucker
on Friday night.
You get a shirt and a tax write-off. You cannot
pass that up! Plus, think of how you could
embarrass your kids by wearing this shirt. That
alone is worth the cost.
I'll keep score right here----
The bid for the
Big Ass Fan tee-shirt is currently at $100.
Susan,
I have a hundred dollar check that says I really
need this t-shirt. My neighbors in Bellingham, Wa
will just not believe what a Texas transplant will
wear in public.
Scott
|
June 19 -
Okay, so there's 2,200 people in Oak Point, Texas, who
can't hardly even speak proper English, but are of a
mind to
pester everybody else about their language ....
A divided City Council has passed a resolution
making English the official language of this North
Texas town.
The resolution prohibits the
council from passing policies or ordinances limiting
the role of English as a common language in the city,
which has about 2,200 people and is located 30 miles
northwest of Dallas.
But that
ain't all. No, sireee. There's a reason they
did this thing.
"I've heard from quite a few
neighbors from the positive side," council member Mark
Rakestraw said. "They don't want another dime of their
tax money spent on" translating government documents
into Spanish, he said.
Well, I
tell you what, Mr. Rakestraw, when all the Mexican,
Cajun, Czech, and Vietnamese restaurants in town quit
translating their menus, your butt is going to starve to
death. Two can play this game.
The good news is that "the measure was opposed by most
of the people who turned out at Monday's council
meeting," and anybody with a good sense of humor will
start checking Mr. Rakestraw for proper English grammar.
June 18 -
Ya
think
the boy needs to see an addiction specialist?
White House officials made extensive use of their RNC
e-mail accounts. The RNC has preserved
140,216 e-mails sent or received by Karl Rove. Over
half of these e-mails (75,374) were sent to or
received from individuals using official “.gov” e-mail
accounts. Other heavy users of RNC e-mail accounts
include former White House Director of Political
Affairs Sara Taylor (66,018 e-mails) and Deputy
Director of Political Affairs Scott Jennings (35,198
e-mails). These e-mail accounts were used by White
House officials for official purposes, such as
communicating with federal agencies about federal
appointments and policies.
There has been extensive destruction of the e-mails of
White House officials by the RNC. Of the 88
White House officials who received RNC e-mail
accounts, the RNC has preserved no e-mails for 51
officials. In a deposition, Susan Ralston, Mr. Rove’s
former executive assistant, testified that many of the
White House officials for whom the RNC has no e-mail
records were regular users of their RNC e-mail
accounts.
One hundred and forty thousand emails on just one
account for Karl Rove? Ho boy, add that to the ten
thousand he sent to the ladies on the
hotboywonder@whitehouse.com account and you’re
looking at a man with a problem. Okay, so I just made
up that hotboy email account, but you know he has one
like that. He's just gotta.
People have often pondered on why Nixon didn’t
destroy the tapes. The answer is: mainly because it’s
illegal. Illegal doesn’t bother these guys.
Them and illegal? Practically eating out of the
same feedbag.
June 18 -
Our county judge, Bob Hebert, ought to run for Congress.
He's already got one part down well - paying family
members from your campaign funds.
 Today,
Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington
(CREW) released its first-ever analysis of the misuse
of power by the chairmen and ranking members of all
House of Representative committees and subcommittees,
as well as top leadership positions, to financially
benefit their family members. The new report,
Family Affair, names 96 members from 33 states:
44 Democrats and 53 Republicans.
To view the report, please visit the
Family Affair website page.
Members of
Congress are having a ball enriching their family
members.
Go take a look for yourself - there's quite a few
Texans on the list. While you're there,
download the whole report and read it. It's
astounding.
In Texas, it's illegal to pay either a spouse or a
dependent child from your campaign account.
However, it's perfectly legal to pay an adult child all
you want, just ask Tom DeLay and Andy Meyers. I
guess it's Meyers that bothers me the most because at
least DeLay's daughter votes. Meyer's son doesn't
even bother to vote in general elections.
June 18 - Our
friend David sent me this really, really cool graphic
showing
Purple America from 1960 forward and the changing
voting patterns.
It's just another fun political nerd tool for you to
play with.
June 18 - I
see that some of the Texas Progressive Alliance bloggers
(they won't let me join) have started a
Draft Movement for my favorite candidate for United
States Senate from Texas, Rick Noriega.
Good on 'um.
Now, I don't know this for a fact, but I've heard from
people who know about these kinds of things that the
characters of Matt Santos and his wife on The West Wing
were based on Rick and Melissa Noriega. Everybody
out there who knows Rick and Melissa is now shaking
their heads up and down.
June 17 - Tom
DeLay gave Houston a new city councilwoman who's a
Democrat. Ain't that grand!
Melissa
Noreiga won the seat that was formerly .... well, I
hate to say "occupied" because it was hard to say she
was there, even when she was there ... Shelley Sekula
Gibbs.
When Gibbs ran in the special election to hold DeLay's
congressional office for a month, she had to retire from
city council. She won because Democrats wisely
chose not to run a candidate in that special election.
Shelley served for a whole month, while Congress was on
Christmas vacation. Dumb. Dog dump dumb.
Democrats won the full term congressional seat in
November. And last night, Democrats won Shelley's
city council seat making it a DeLay Double Down.
Thank you for
retreating and surrendering, Tom!
Hal has pictures of the fat lady singing. What
Hal doesn't tell you is that he was pretty much in
charge of the part of Houston that's in Fort Bend County
for Melissa. He delivered her 79% of the vote.
Yep, he ought to be half-full today.
Okay, let's see what we can do to get
Rick Noriega elected to the Senate.
June 15 -
Have I told you lately that John Kelso cracks me up?
He's now got an idea to put the
Bush Presidential library in Albania, and if that
doesn't work .....
The other idea I had was to put
the George W. Bush Presidential Library in a
bookmobile and drive it around Texas. That way, it
could be out of everybody's town by sundown.
But, John,
who's going to pay the toll road fees for the
bookmobile? That could run into thousands of
dollars before it even cleared the Panhandle.
Super idea. I'll volunteer to
drive the bookmobile!
Mickey
|
June 15 - Just
in time for your weekend entertainment. MB sent us
this really cool opportunity to Play Texas Lege!
It's called the
Redistricting Game and shows how you can insure
victories for your political party for a full decade if
you can elect a majority to the State Lege just one
time.
It's like pretending to Tom DeLay without the hot tub
or the fancy vacations with Jack Abramoff. Have
fun!
June 15 -
Brahahaha. It's fun to watch Republicans become
their own worst enemy with fighting greed factors.
Our own State Senator
Glenn Hegar is
to blame for killing a charming Republican bill to screw
landowners out of their property to build toll roads all
over the damn state.
But, Hegar didn't do this to help Texas landowners, of
course.
He did it to help a fellow Republican politician,
Beverly Woolley.
For most of the session, the bill enjoyed the full
support of Perry and other top leaders. But critics
say the amendment by Sen. Glenn Hegar Jr., R-Katy,
would put a halt to countless road construction
projects across the state by making the costs
prohibitive.
Now some are questioning the motives of at least
one key legislator: bill author Rep. Beverly Woolley,
R-Houston, who could stand to personally benefit from
the Hegar amendment if the bill becomes law.
Woolley owns a business, Houston Armature Works
Inc. on Houston's Harrisburg Boulevard, where Houston
Metro is planning to construct a four-mile rapid
transit extension. It's "a huge project" expected to
take three years to complete, said agency spokeswoman
Sandra Salazar.
This is such fun to watch. Republicans used to
just want to screw the average taxpayer out of money -
but now they're going after each other.
June 14 - They
say that what goes around, comes around. Texas'
greatest poet, Willie Nelson, even wrote a song about it
- "A Little Old Fashioned Justice Comin' 'Round."
When our State Representative Charlie Howard first ran
for the State Lege, he made much ado about his opponent
being named to the Texas Monthly's Ten Worse Legislators
List.
Straight from Austin, I have just heard that Charlie
got named to the list - again. Worse. Now,
in this session, that took some kind of doin'.
Details to come as soon as Texas Monthly goes on the
market.
By the way, Zerwas and Olivo didn't make any of the
lists.
June 14 -
Yeah,
but will
they let me go to his house and whack him upside the
head?
They contain innocent-sounding subject lines such
as "His baby pics," or "Hey." But when opened, they
advertise things like male sexual-enhancement pills.
The e-mails arrive by the thousands, and they seem
to come from nowhere.
But the state attorney general's office says many
have come from a 20-year-old man who lives in a small
home on Gardenia Drive in Allen.
Okay, so they found this guy. So, what did they do
with him?
Texas
Attorney General Greg Abbott's office reached a
settlement with Mr. Villanueva this week in federal
district court in Austin. The judgment prohibits Mr.
Villanueva from using or leasing zombies. It also
prohibits him from sending misleading commercial
e-mails and requires him to pay $5,000 in attorneys'
fees.
Oh wow,
who is this guy? The Paris Hilton of breaking and
entering?
No, no nonononono..... I have a better idea. We
use his house for a garbage dump for about a year.
Damn, I should run for attorney general.
June 13 -
We’re
entering hurricane season around here and I ain’t at all
happy about it. I hate hurricanes. And, apparently,
the feeling is mutual because in the last one I got
caught in traffic for 6 hours to go 11 miles and then
gave up and came back home to fight that sucker
head-on.
So, adding to the bad news
is this.
MIAMI -- An aging weather satellite crucial to
accurate predictions on the intensity and path of
hurricanes could fail at any moment and plans to
launch a replacement have been pushed back seven years
to 2016.
In a letter obtained by The Associated Press, the
National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration's
chief said the failure of the QuikScat satellite could
bring more uncertainty to forecasts and widen the
areas that are placed under hurricane watches and
warnings.
Oh well, that’s what Republican government gets you. I
guess Halliburton doesn’t build satellites. Good Lord,
this is Michael Brown on nuclear energy and caffeine
maintenance. Once more, this is incompetence that no
one has to answer for.
So does anyone recall that 1,800 people died in
Katrina?
I hate hurricane season almost as much as I hate
those damn short-sited Republicans.
Hi Susan, I guess
this broke weather satellite situation will clear
the way for that 40 story garbage dump out your way
that was going to block the tv station signal to
said satellite! Now that is proof there is method to
their madness. Thanks for the Dist 22-Tom Delay post
that was an lol moment for me!
KAREN
|
June 13 -
For
the eternally smug around here who feel that DeLay’s
Congressional seat is federally mandated by law to be
held by some rightwing kook who foams at the mouth at
the mention of anything not fully sanctioned by the
Belles of Heaven Republican Women’s Club and Our Lady of
Perpetual Virginity Junior College, there’s some bad
news.
You may not get the seat back. Mainly because no one
in their right mind wants to have a slapping match with
the aforementioned groups in order win the GOP primary.
So you’re left with Bob Talton, who is just flat
nuts, being considered a viable candidate.
Talton t |
