Gov. Rick Perry's
much-touted "Talkin' Texas" online campaign event
included eyebrow-raising proposals such as a
two-thirds vote of the Legislature and voter
approval before state taxes can be raised.
The live Web cast
also was unavailable to me and lots of other people
who couldn't log in, showing that if you live by the
Internet, you can be attacked on the Internet.
"We were definitely
hacked. We'll have a statement shortly. The whole
site is down," said Perry spokesman Mark Miner.
I swear that this race is going to involve water
balloons, panty raids, and keg stealing before it's over
with.
Our guv doesn't want to be the
first govenor who has executed
an innocent person. That might
not look too good to some
voters. Yesterday he abruptly
removed three members of the
Texas Forensic Science
Commission, which was in the
middle of its investigation of
the tragic fire, which resulted
in the execution of Cameron Todd
Willingham. Several weeks ago
the New Yorker has a long story
about this case. Barry Scheck
in on this matter like no
windstorm our purdy guv has ever
been in. Bring on the
hairspray!
I
got my thank you letter from
Perry, and I hope Shaniqua can
get a nice car.
june
September 29 -
Max Baucus can kiss my big blue butt.
September 29 -
Hey, the Lord of the Dance dang near
dropped his partner on her head last night.
Kinda like he did to Newt Gingrich. And Jack
Abramoff. And Jack Scanlan. And the workers
in the Mariana Islands. And Dick Armey (okay so
Armey deserved it). And that little waitress at
the Capitol Club in Austin. And his former
business partners. And ... crap, face it, all of
us.
He's gonna get the boot and he has no way of supporting
himself. He's tried everything and everything has
been a dump.
Look for him next on Biggest Loser!
"He's gonna get the boot..."
NO,
NO, NO, NO, NO!!!!!!!!!11 Stop with
the negative waves. This is the
best time of the best time of
my entire Delay
modified life-cycle.
Puhleeeze rally the troops and vote,
vote, vote. We needs to keep Tom on
the airwaves for more and moar
public humiliation. The FACT that
he has set himself up for failure on
accounta his mainstream press,
liberal blogger, Nazi, facist, communist
inspired and conspired,
near-miss, pre-mixed, pre-stress
fracture-type-thing is simply more
reason to support him now in his
desperate time of need. Listening
to conservatives whine about how
they "never had a chance" is music
to my ears. They set themselves up
for failure, and then fulfill their
prophecies.
Remember, vote early - and vote
often. Delay for Biggest Loser!
USExpat
Susan - he
needs to stay on the show. He
needs the money. For Lawyers.
Large Tim
September 29
- Dude, this would put Mark Sanford and Bernie
Madoff to shame!
Gov. Rick Perry woos
campaign volunteers by talking about fiscal
restraint, limited government and states' rights.
And if all that
fails, he offers them cash.
The Republican
governor's re-election campaign is paying volunteers
to sign up other volunteers, and it promises more
cash for those turning out voters in the March
primary. The campaign hopes for big dividends from
the Amway-style program, known as Perry Home
Headquarters.
I'm not saying that these fluffy white boys are fixing
to be taken on a ride, but what keeps people from
scamming the scammers?
A Twitter post from a
woman identified as Shaniqua Curry shows how easy it
is to join Perry's grass-roots army, even if it is
for selfish reasons:
"HELP ME RAISE MONEY
FOR MY NEXT CAR!!! COPY, PASTE, AND SIGN UP TO
SUPPORT RICK PERRY!" the tweet read.
Clicking on the link
sends you to a Perry campaign Web page that appears
to have a unique identifier so the recruiter can be
paid.
Hell, I'll take Perry's $20 and help Shaniqua get a car.
He can't follow my butt into the voting booth. I
can vote for the Democrat, take Rick Perry's money, and
get Shaniqua a car -- talk about a win-win-win.
Isn't this exactly the same thing that has
the R's all in a tizzy about Acorn?
tony
Well I sure do appreciate the
effort to help me out. It really
does get hard going to school
and working and not having the
means of transportation
to live a stable life.
I just signed up Lyndon Johnson
for Perry's... er, "Buy Shaniqua
a Car" ... campaign :-) Lady
Bird, too!
Richard Grabman
NOTE FROM SUSAN: I signed
up with my real name and
address. The worst that
happened was that Rick sent me
an email thanking me.
What's he gonna do? Come
over to my house and act prissy?
Y'all, Shaniqua needs a car.
Let Rick Perry buy her one.
September 28
- We get email with visual delights ---
Susan-
Hey,
didja know this is Banned Books Week? I
wonder hominy of your pal
Cynthia Dunbar's books made the
list...she'll probably put them in her
(soon-to-be?) ex-husband's car and set them
on fire...
Kellybee
September 28 -
Everybody knows that Governor Rick Perry has barb wire
for brains, but he's so lucky that he could fall in a
septic tank and come out smelling like Channel No. 5.
However, he appears to be
luckier than normal when it come to his personal
wealth ----
Gov. Rick
Perry never had much money growing up, and he has
spent most of his adult life in public office,
drawing a part-time salary as a legislator and
relatively modest earnings in statewide office for
the last quarter century.
But thanks to his investments and a series of
private land deals, some that took advantage of his
political connections, Perry has squeaked over the
millionaire line, records examined by The Associated
Press show.
“Rick Perry should do an infomercial on how to
become a millionaire as a professional politician,”
said Hutchison campaign manager Terry Sullivan.
“From abusing his power over appointments to getting
sweetheart real estate deals from supporters, he’s a
regular get-rich-quick icon.”
It has been
said that politics is the art of keeping as many balls
in the air as possible while protecting your own.
I can't prove it, but I think that was written about
Rick Perry.
September 28
- Well, Tom DeLay made
Dickipedia and he's dancing the Tango tonight.
There's not a much better way for me to start a week.
I'm suspecting that he's gonna come up short in the
keeping up department tonight, but, mercy, watching him
Tango is gonna be fun.
We shall see if a money-launderer can do a little cheek
to cheek.
After looking like a waltzing roadrunner last week, I
can't even imagine what Tom DeLay is going to substitute
for footwork this week.
Please don't forget to vote for him - being a finalist
on Dancing with the Stars will serve him well in prison.
Can you even imagine the bragging rights that Jack
Abramoff is getting off this?
September 27
- Texas Governor Rick Perry continues his
tanglefooted attempt to keep the Govship. This
time he's hacked off the
entire Republican power structure, and hoo boy, they
are whining like little girls.
Rick doesn't like to talk about Kay Bailey Hutchison
personally because he looks so bitchy when he does.
So, he's decided to be manly and attack the whole danged
GOP.
Well, I say Good on him!
Gov.
Rick Perry’s broad criticisms of Washington
Republicans aren’t sitting well with Washington
Republicans.
In a closed-door
meeting Thursday in Washington with Perry chief of
staff Ray Sullivan, several top aides to Texas
Republican U.S. House members expressed anger over
the language Perry is using as he tries to fend off
a challenge from U.S. Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison.
Perry often criticizes Hutchison in code by
complaining about Washington.
Stoking their anger
was a Sept. 14 fundraising letter in which Perry
contrasts Texas’ relatively healthy budget climate
with the Washington model of “more government, pork
barrel spending and fiscal ruin.”
But instead of just
talking about Democratic congressional leaders or
President Barack Obama, the letter calls out
Republicans.
“Let’s be frank,” the
letter says. “Washington Republicans got us in this
mess.”
Well, danged, the one time in his whole life that Rick
Perry tells the truth and the Ship of Hate turns on him
like he's an Aggie in Austin.
Oh wait. He is. Never mind.
September 26
- You can't make this stuff up. You can't.
Well, maybe you could but your brain would explode and
make a mess.
A dude named Bill Keller, sporting a bleached blonde
Afro, who is out of prison for an insider trading
conviction, and his buddy Attorney Gary Kreep (see, I
told you that you can't make this stuff up) have shot an
infomercial to get people to send them $30.
But instead of getting a Shamwow, you get a Shampoop.
It's the world's first
birther infomercial.
No kidding, for merely $30, these guys will send a fax
in your name to all the state Attorney Generals asking
them to force Barack Obama to produce a birth
certificate.
This might well be the coolest scam ever.
You get to take people's money, not ever send the fax,
and attempt to delegitimize the President all at once.
This infomercial is running in Lubbock, Texas. I
have been to Lubbock, Texas. It was named after a
Confederate veteran and it ain't changed much since.
It is home of the university who hired Alberto Gonzales
to teach political science. It ain't exactly hell,
but you can see hell from there.
I'm figuring Keller and Kreep know Suckertown when they
see it.
This infomercial apparently comes on after midnight.
You know, when your audience is a proper mix of drunks
and people home from Klan meetings.
Gee, I haven't seen that scam before. But,
I'm thinking that for $30 bucks (that's an
expensive bunch of faxes) you should at
least be able to get a prayer cloth or
something to show for your money. Either
that, or an autographed pic of Tom DeLay in
his dancing togs.
DB
Way back
in the 70's David Viscott wrote a book
called "The Making of a Psychiatrist." It's
opening sentence, as I recall, was
"Happiness is watching Lubbock get smaller
in your rear view mirror." More than a
modicum of truth in that statement.
George Walker
I am all in favor of a good con job,
especially when carried off by unctuous
right wingers. I’m also in favor of
ignorant right wingers becoming poorer.
Less money they can donate to Rick
Perry.
Not one court hearing this birther
nonsense has found a bit of evidence to
support it. All the more reason Keller
and Kreep should keep on trying.
Unlike
people without health insurance, homeowners have
access to public option flood insurance.
Even those who fail
to take personal responsibility to buy insurance to
protect their property can get benefits, thanks in
good part to politicians who are leading opponents
of public option healthcare.
Consider the example
of Trent Lott of Mississippi, who was that state's
senior senator when Hurricane Katrina hit in 2005,
flooding his home looking out on the Gulf. Lott had
not exercised personal responsibility by taking out
flood insurance even though it was available from
the federal government at low cost. He did have
private insurance, but his insurer refused to pay
much of the claim, saying it was not wind damage
(which was covered by the policy), but water damage
(which was excluded).
So, on those days that Mr. Ego jumps in your
head and you start thinking you're all that,
just remember: you are far less important
that Trent Lott's house.
By the way, does this make Trent Lott's house the
birthplace of Mississippi Socialism?
September 24
- I would like to make an apology to my
Congressvarmint, Pete Olson. Thanks to a heads-up
from my friend Alfredo, I now know that Pete Olson is
not the dumbest man in Congress.
This guy is.
U.S. Rep. Paul Broun
is again raising the specter of Democrats turning
the United States into a totalitarian state. Broun,
R-Athens, apparently has not changed his belief that
President Obama may be a fascist since he made
similar remarks in Augusta in November and then in
an Associated Press interview.
He
told a meeting of the Morgan County Republicans on
Wednesday night that Obama already has or will have
the three things he needs to make himself a
dictator: a national police force, gun control and
control over the press. “He has the three things
that are necessary to establish an authoritarian
government,” Broun said. “And so we need to be
ever-vigilant, because freedom is precious.”
As he did when
comparing Obama to Hitler and the Soviets last year,
Broun cited a speech Obama gave in Colorado during
the campaign last July calling for “a civilian
national security force that’s just as powerful,
just as strong, just as well-funded” as the
military.
September 24 - I
like Hank Gilbert.
I have given him campaign donations and campaigned for
him. I think he'd be a great Governor of Texas.
I do.
But, he has got to quit
this kind of stuff.
Hank Gilbert, a
Tyler-area rancher who ran for agriculture
commissioner in 2006, today accused fellow
Democratic gubernatorial hopeful Tom Schieffer of
stealing his education ideas.
Gilbert’s concern
centers on Schieffer’s remarks about
pre-kindergarten, dropout prevention and vocational
education during a visit to a University of Texas at
Arlington class on Tuesday that was documented in
the Fort Worth Star-Telegram.
Whining and issuing press
releases that someone stole your ideas ain't leadership.
It's silly. And sending the press a memo with “SCHIEFFER_HIT"
written on it reeks of immaturity. I know Hank's
better than that.
Look, good ideas are good ideas. If your opponent
thinks you have a good idea, be flattered.
I ain't voting for you just because you said it first.
Nobody expects a Governor to invent all the good ideas.
People expect a Governor to know a good idea when they
see one. Period. The end.
This ain't junior high school and somebody is copying
off your paper. These are real issues about
people's lives. You got a good idea - dammit,
share it.
Look, Hank, smile that great smile you have and simply
say, "I'm glad that Mr. Schieffer likes my idea. I
hope he gets some of his own because we have lots of
problems to solve in this state after Rick Perry made a
mess so big it wouldn't fit in Palo Duro Canyon."
And then leave it alone.
Get this train on the track, Hank, because you'd be a
great Governor.
By the way, please do not interpret this to mean that I
can think of even one nice thing to say about Tom
Schieffer. I can't. And I even pondered on
it for a while. I got nothin'.
In a
column for Townhall.com, action star and
conservative activist Chuck Norris calls on tea
partiers to stop using the modern American flag as a
means of protest against the current administration.
And if you insist on using the 50-star flag, well,
you can buy a
tea-stained one for just $73.50 to show
"solidarity with our Founders."
Chuck Norris is so full of hot air that he
could give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation over the
telephone.
Okay, so my neighbor hangs out an old flag with a stain
on it. Wanna know what I'd think? I'd think
he has an old flag with a stain on it.
Sounds to me like the ultra conservative World Net
Daily has got themselves a dandy little scam.
Babe, for $15.99 cash American money I can send you a
flag stained with whatever you'd like - tamales, grape
jelly, Truman's muddy feet, wet crepe paper, you name
it.
And I wanna know what the fascination with "solidarity"
to the Founding Fathers is all about. Does Chuck
want to go back to slave owning? No suffrage for
women? Child labor?
Just between you and me, I highly suspect that this
whole Founding Fathers thing is code for at least two of
those things. They probably like children.
Somebody ought to explain to Mr.
Norris that desecrating the flag is
unlawful. I have no idea what the legal
parameters are, but it seems to me that
deliberate soiling of the flag would
constitute desecration.
S.
It is against the rules to fly a
damaged or stained flag. If it is not in
proper condition it is to be disposed
of. A stained flag is an insult to the
whole idea of a unified symbol. Only the
best looking standards are displayed by
any country, army etc. It's called
pride. Chuck seems to have lost his.
Cheers,
Robin
September 23 -
Poor Tom DeLay.
No, seriously.
Is it possible to have the anti-Midas Touch?
First, he resigns from Congress. Then he tries to
find a job. Having no luck at actually working for
living, he writes a book called No Retreat, No
Surrender, which is ironic considering that he
retreated, surrendered, and ran away from Congress
waving a white flag while speaking French. The
book sells three copies.
Then he tries a hand at a pay-per-view website.
That attracted about as much attention as a hog callin'.
And, come to think of it, it pretty much was a hog
callin'.
Then he tired to open a Republican think-tank,
momentarily forgetting that the word "think" was in the
title. That went down faster than double geared
lightening.
Next thing we know, his much-touted homes for foster
children, Rio Bend, has gone from 8 families to 1 family
and that Lutheran Ministries has pulled out.
Then he tries dancing on tv to earn money. He's
just awful at it. Even worse, now we find out that
he hurt the ratings of the show.
If his next job is back to exterminating, I wouldn't
have him to your house because he's probably carrying
the plague.
I know that everybody wants to see him in an orange
jumpsuit, but watching him fail at everything he does is
perfectly fine entertainment for me.
You mean he got PAID to do that??? I STILL
liked his Wild Thing dance. It explained to
me why he was called the hammer......partied
with the democrats indeed.......and had no
hip action!
September 23
- A good lawyer knows that the best legal strategy
is to stall a case until everybody dies or they change
the law.
Good lawyers are winning in Dallas.
It seems that the lawsuit to stop SMU from building a
library to George W Bush, also known as The Temple of
Doom, has hit a timely snag.
A gnat's knee away from settling this sucker in SMU's
favor,
the judge withdraws himself from the case.
But the implications for
the case itself – which has indirect ramifications
for the George W. Bush Presidential Library at SMU –
were fairly obvious: It no longer seems to be on the
verge of ending.
So the hemming and hawing will continue, and we can
still hope that the seats in the Texas Lege will be
regained by sane people who will pass a law that you
cannot build libraries to The Worst President Ever.
September 22 -
Y'all, Richard, who
knows where all the booty is hidden, sent us the best
link ever. There is a contest to give the Texas
GOP a new logo.
Here's the winners so far.
Some of them are a little ... oh, shall we say ... raw
for my family oriented website, so head on over and take
a gander at them all for yourself.
My favorite is -----
September 22 -
Y'all are gonna just love this.
The Huffington Post has set up a special Rick Perry is
Going To Hell Faster Than An Angel Can Catch Him
page.
I have a scary feeling that Rick goes to the page every
day just to look at the handsome pictures of himself.
I want to thank Kenneth for sharing this with me.
When he dies, we're gonna have to screw Rick Perry in
the ground.
September 22
- A small group of determined people trying to make
a difference can be fun to watch.
Go take
a look.
It is hopeless to contact our Texas Senators. One
is the man mixing the kool-aide and the other has sold
her soul to be Governor.
Our Congressman, Pete Olson, is dumb as a sack of
hammers and will only move away from his desire to see
the children of undocumented workers die at the door of
emergency rooms when Sweet Jesus rolls his eyes at Pete
personally.
So, if Democrats aren't willing to stand up for the 75%
of American who want the public option, they can kiss my
big blue butt.
Help these guys out.
September 21
(after DWTS)
- Absolutely true story: the minute Dancing
with the Stars was over, I got a phone call from a guy
who served in the Texas Lege with Tom.
"You know how he shook his beehind in everyone's face
as often as he could?" asked the guy. "Well, that what
he did - figuratively - every day in the Lege."
I believe it.
By the way, if I tell you that it's Christmas, you
better go buy some little twinkling lights. I told
you he would be just gosh awful, didn't I?
Oh please, go vote for him so I can watch some more.
Oh pretty please.
By the way, his daughter Dani sent two emails during
the program explaining how to cheat when voting for her
Dad. Just habit, I guess.
Susan,
I
just watched Tom's first dance. He
looks like he has one buttcheek,
indicating he was either wearing a
Spanx (you can tell it ended just
above the knee) or a diaper. What
do you think?
june
Tom DeLay, the highest ranking
indicted guest on this show!
WILD THING!!!! He truly carried it
off, which tells me something about
being the hammer. him saying i have
much tougher critics than these
(punk ass) judges. they should have
had Ronnie Earle be the guest judge!
Sybil
I
don't care about seeing DeLay in
sequins, near as much as I would
like to see him in an orange
jumpsuit.
Evelyn
Ms. Susan,
Thank Zeus for the hammertoe video.
I haven't seen high heels like that
on a man since Sonny Bono was on TV.
Regards,
Charly Hoarse
Susan. A classic guffaw. The
Olbermann program. “And next Tom
Delay Dancing with the Stars –
that should serve him well in
prison”. Bud
September 21 -
Y'all, do not forget to watch Tom DeLay on Dancing with
the Stars tonight. There is a giant Liberace treat
involved ---
Elvis meets animal print
... They said I wasn't sparkin' enough compared to
Cheryl, so they added rhinestones to my collar.
And do not forget to
register to vote for him because I am almost
positive that his next outfit will involve pink and lots
of sequins. You know they'll have to do that to
keep people interested.
Y'all, I really need to see Tom DeLay dancin' for
dollars like a pavement princess at the Colorado Club.
I've worked hard and fully deserve to see this every
week for a month.
And for those who are believe that voting for Tom will
just encourage a comeback: Remember Tucker Carlson
on DWTS? Yeah, right, great career move, Tucker.
Last Saturday night at Discovery
Green Park there was a benefit for the
SWAMP (Southwest Alternative Media
Project) that featured a sing-along
with the musical episode of Buffy the
Vampire Slayer, Once More With Feeling.
I think that Tom Delay starred in it:
Actually, this role was played by the
amazingly talented Hinton Battle.
-Jeromy
If
anyone was wondering how HTT
out-altituded his dance partner,
here is the uncropped truth.
USExpat
(Created with MS Paint in
less than 9000 hours)
I love
Wonkette. Here's her(?) post
about Delay's daughter sending
out instructions on how one
person can vote multiple times
for her father tonight. Fruit,
tree, yada yada. Since you're
hoping to watch him make a fool
of himself several weeks in a
row,
I thought you'd enjoy this.
Texas advocates for the
wrongly convicted are going after a sheriff's deputy
who says his trained dogs have sniffed out bad guys
in more than 2,000 scent identification lineups.
The Innocence Project of
Texas says it will release a report next week that
exposes scent identification as junk science that's
led to an untold number of wrongful convictions. The
group argues that scent lineups should be
inadmissible in court, and it dismisses what Fort
Bend County Sheriff's Deputy Keith Pikett does as
“dog whispering.”
Pikett also faces two
federal lawsuits from men implicated in the dog
handler's scent lineups. Charges were later dropped
in both cases.
Pikett's attorney said
his client believe the scent IDs are accurate.
I can't prove it, but I am pretty near darn certain that
this has something to do with lazy deputies.
Let me tell you this: For a treat, my puppy
Truman will come tinkle on the leg of anybody who smells
vaguely like that cute little poodle down the street.
I'll head on over to the goofy head honchos at the Fort
Bend Sheriff's Department and see if there's gainful
employment for me and Truman.
Bubba really doesn't want me commenting negatively
about this whole thing because he thinks it'd be more
fun than the circus to cross examine the dog on the
witness stand. It should be noted, however, that
the dog has 40 more IQ points than the handler.
Susan.
Sniffing out bad guys – what about the
biggest stinker of them all – DeLay?
Bud
September 19
- For both of you who have been wondering what I've
been up to ---
there's this evidence that I have, in fact, been
doing something constructive. It's a list of the
14 Democratic Senators who are wavering on health care.
You can now comment on the Democratic website without
registering first. However, this is subject to
change if those two idiots who messed up the
conversation on Fort Bend Now make an appearance.
Yes, Charlie and Chris, I am talking about you!
So, head on over there and throw in your two cents.
As we told you
yesterday, the Texas State Board of Education is
meeting in Austin today for the first public
discussion of new history textbook standards, which
include a controversial section that would require
knowledge of Newt Gingrich, Phyllis Schlafly, et al.
Before the board
turned to social studies, the hearing got to an odd
start when an animated member of the public
testifying about the importance of health education
declared, "I'm 56 years old and I'm a virgin." The
chair promptly warned her to stay on topic.
No wonder the far right is so damn cranky.
Honey, I think that by now, since you've been putting
this off for quite a while, you've got about the same
chance as a pig in a dog race to do anything about this
problem you've got.
And, there ain't nobody at the Texas State Board of
Education who can fix it for you. Head on over to
the men's room at the Minneapolis airport and somebody
will be along directly to fix this.
And, speaking of facelifts,
Wonkette's fans are wondering about why Tom looks
kinda pasty. Tom had a full facelift about 6 years
ago and I'm pretty sure he's had some work done lately.
His bald spot on top seems to be gone, too.
Plastic surgery or Dorian Gray? Your choice.
September 17 -
Oh
sweet irony, rain down on Texas Congressidiot Kevin
Brady's little bald empty head.
Rep.
Kevin Brady asked for an explanation of why the
government-run subway system didn’t, in his view,
adequately prepare for this past weekend’s rally to
protest government spending and government services.
Seriously.
The Texas Republican
on Wednesday released a letter he sent to
Washington’s Metro system complaining that the
taxpayer-funded subway system was unable to properly
transport protesters to the rally to protest
government spending and expansion.
“These individuals
came all the way from Southeast Texas to protest the
excessive spending and growing government intrusion
by the 111th Congress and the new Obama
administration,” Brady wrote.
Oh Honey, when even the conservative Wall Street Journal
thinks you're funny, you win some kind of award.
I'm not sure what award that would be, but I'm sure it's
gold and has First Place written somewhere on it.
September 17
- Y'all, I generally make it a rule not to make fun
of people with obvious mental health issues, but
sometimes you just gotta ----
I wonder if Rush Limbaugh could loan Glen Beck some of
his pills? The poor man needs something to calm
him down.
No, seriously, come on. You gotta feel bad for
someone that disconnected with reality. He's so
out there that his reality is 50 miles from nowhere, by
telephone.
September 16 -
Bob Dunn, my friend and neighbor has a new website we
all can relate to:
Splattastic
Check it out - it's truly news you can use.
(It's work safe, ironically.)
September 16
- Feliz Deis y Seis de Septembre!
Here's the deal. I'm
going to the most popular Mexican restaurant in town for
lunch and a Margarita with some girlfriends. We
have decided that if we see any Republicans in the
restaurant who even look like they might be celebrating
Deis y Seis, we're going to go to their table and holler
"You lie!" repeatedly.
Plus, we're going to tell them that the guy in the back
who washed their knives and forks has a hacking cough
and a rash because you - yes, you, Mr. Republican -
denied him health care.
This should be fun!
Susan,
I had to
LOL when I read about your plans at a
Mexican restaurant. As a Hispanic,
Chicano, Mexican-American or whatever is
PC I say, you go girl!
Feliz
Diez y Seis de Septiembre to you. Have a
margarita for me.
Jesse
September 15 -
If you are delighting in following
Tom DeLay on Twitter, which seems a real appropriate
venue for a twit, you know he got a stress facture on
his foot. Probably from carrying around all that
guilt; that can be stressful.
Now before I get indignant emails from local
Republicans saying that I wish mild harm on their heroes
and I should be ashamed of myself, please allow me to
say .... yes and yes.
Those who know me know that I have a Tom DeLay voodoo
doll. There's a pin in its foot. Seriously.
Where would you like me to stick it next?
No, wait, don't answer that.
Whut reelay happened...
He's soooooo heroic!!!!!
USExpat
Do you think we should get a prayer
circle going?
Am I going to heck for that?
Deb
Now
he's saying it's just a "pre-stress
fracture." Kind of like he's a "pre-excon."
Hey
Zeus
Dear
Susan,
I think he's malingering so he won't
have to be humiliated on that TV dance
show.
Don A
Maybe
he just now realized what he looks like
----
It's
Chorus Line Tom!
How
can those little tiny feet hold up that
great big ego?
Tammy
from Miami
Susan. It would be nice if Tom could
have his fracture taken care of by a
prison doctor.
Bud
September
15 -
My buddy Mike found this and I cannot wait for you to
see it.
The International Brotherhood and Sisterhood for the
Establishment of a Republican Homeland Somewhere Far
Away
has a website.
Relocation Incentives
It is assumed that a
percentage of the refugees will resist our
relocation efforts, and so, we will be offering the
following incentives:*
40 Acres
A FEMA trailer (one for
every two families)
A Mule
A Bible (Gideon Deluxe
Motel Edition)
One
gun, chosen by them, from their collection (no ammo
please)
A two year subscription
to the Wall Street Journal
All the coins they can
carry
This is the best darn idea I've heard all week.
However, it's only Tuesday so somebody may come up with
a pill that makes ignorance painful this week.
That would definitely win.
Meanwhile, you'll get a Tuesday morning grin from this
site.
I was up in the D.C. balcony area when Pete
Olsen was arguing that his constituents
wanted Credit Card Companies to charge 32%
so that they could have access to money when
they lost their jobs (as God is my witness).
I played with my shoe for a long time before
I decided not to throw it at him or at the
table in front of him. I thought about
throwing it at his desk to make a point, but
I don't throw well and I might have beaned
him accidentally and faced an assault
charge... still I thought it might be worth
it. It truth, especially after Joe Wilson's
behavior, I should have damn well thrown it.
Nancy
Dear
Susan,
I think they need one for all of them
Libertarian types who seem to think that
they don't need anyone else. Let's give
each of them an island all to his/her own
self and see how long it takes for them to
go extinct.
Don A
OMG! I can
already hear the screams of the
Republicans!<ROFLMAO> Whoever put up this
website deserves the Congressional Medal of
Honor or SOMEthing. Priceless.
Marie
Why do
they need a mule? They already have two
jackasses in each family.
Sam Davis
My fellow
libruls and I are so grateful to you for
sharing
The International Brotherhood and Sisterhood
for the Establishment of a Republican
Homeland Somewhere Far Away!
A bit of snark is never amiss on a day chock
full of bigotry, lies and other tidbits from
the wingnut nation.
Hugs,
Gramiam
September 14 -
Just when you thought it was safe for the President of
the United States to address Congress -
Boehner on Democrats’ Resolution on
Rep. Joe Wilson
Washington, Sep 14 -
House Republican Leader John Boehner (R-OH) issued
the following statement regarding reports that
Democratic Leaders plan to introduce a resolution
condemning Rep. Joe Wilson, (R-SC):
“Rep. Wilson has apologized to the President, and
the President accepted his apology. Last Thursday,
Speaker Pelosi said that she believed it was time to
move on and discuss health care. I couldn’t agree
more, and that’s why I plan to vote ‘no’ on this
resolution. Instead of pursuing this type of petty
partisanship, we should be working together to lower
costs and expand access to affordable, high-quality
health coverage on behalf of the American people.”
1. Exactly when did Wilson apologize to the
American people for being an internationally acclaimed
doofus?
2. When did Boehner start caring about "working
together" on any damn thing?
3. What the hell is "heath coverage" and what the
dickens does it have to do with heath care?
4. So, Boehner, if we start filling the Senate
gallery and heckle you, all we owe you is a private
apology? Hell, I'm game, Babe.
5. Tell me, Boehner, what he fool tarnation is
wrong with you?
When the heck did they stop caring about
petty partisanship? I thought that was part
of their MO!!!
Jennifer Radcliffe reported in the
Houston Chronicle on August 23, an
inspiring story of a 50-year-old man
overcoming illiteracy. What amazes me
is that he once was among the 52% of
adults in Harris county who are
illiterate. That explains a lot. The
majority of adults can only get their
information by listening to it, and they
seem to favor listening to Glenn Beck,
Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, etc.
Quick, everybody, volunteer in adult
literacy programs, and you know what
to use for your lesson material.
Julia
September 14 -
So when they ask me exactly what day it was when I gave
up on CNN, I have an answer ---
There was rude behavior at the MTV awards. Well,
now there's a shocker.
And in what possible way is this news anyway?
They feed us "news" that's only of interest to teenagers
and then wonder why some of us act like junior high
schoolers during a Presidential address to Congress?
Cripes, people. You cannot put Kanye West acting
the fool in the same front page location you put World
Trade Center attacked.
If you cannot tell the difference between news and
entertainment, then you belong on Fox.
And that's why CNN just lost its spot on my bookmarks
toolbar.
Watch Tom DeLay pole dance for money! Hey, a boy's
gotta do what a boy's gotta do for good whiskey, fat
cigars, and green fees. The DeLay lifestyle
doesn't come cheap and now that all the lobbyist are
gone ---- Daddy needs new Gucci's, Baby.
He's too slimy for a pole dance.
Diane
Susan, I
have to tell you that I have always
enjoyed "Dancing with the Stars",
however I don't think that I will be
watching it this year (at least until
DeLay is voted off). I just don't like
to watch snakes slither...
September 12 -
Thanks to Sybil.
I give it a 10, Dick. It's catchy and you can
dance to it.
September 12
- May Sweet Jesus have mercy on the soul of ----
---- the
cracker who thought this was a persuasive argument
because there's a real special place in hell for them.
There are days I am so afraid for my
country.
And so ashamed of people who claim to
be "patriotic" Americans. How could any
one be so cruel and heartless as to
design and/or carry a sign such as "Bury
Obamacare with Kennedy"?
Karma's a bitch. And I hope she comes
and bites everyone of those million
morons on their collective asses.
Lefty
September 12 -
Keith Obermann should give up on the special comments
and let Bill Maher handle it from now on.
Best Maher ever.
September 12
- Y'all, listen up, we really need to do something
about white Republican men. They are waaaaay outta
control
again.
After months of
trying to use the legal system to protect herself
from her former fiancé, 29-year-old Amanda Ross was
found shot to death early Friday outside her home in
downtown Lexington.
Hours later, the man
she feared, former state representative and one-time
gubernatorial candidate Steve Nunn, was taken into
police custody at the edge of the Hart County
cemetery where his parents are buried.
If it's okay with y'all, I'd like to be "Would Somebody
Please Get Republican Men Under Control Czar." I
think I'm just perfect for that job. I have a big
whip and a chair.
September 11 -
We get email from Patrick in Washington Dee Cee.
Texas is
still represented by plenty of STOOOPID.
And rude as well. You know the guy
holding the handmade sign? That is none
other than Texas’ Rep. Louie Gohmert. I
absolutely could not believe what
happened last night. I just hope we can
get rid of these guys.
Patrick
NOTE FROM
SUSAN: Patrick, see the dope
sitting next to Louis, sleeping?
That's Pete Olson, my very own
Congressvarmint. Making us proud,
ain't he? He's dumber than bean
dip. Also, just between you and
me, Olson is in desperate need of a
glitter enema. Lazy, dumb, and
goofy looking - the trifecta of the
Republican Jackpot.
Reply from
Patrick: I didn't recognize Pete
without his sailor suit.
At least
bean dip tastes good. If I took a
bite of him, I’d have to wash my
mouth out with Tequila.
John Stossel moves from ABC to Fox -- and
raises the average IQ in both locations.
George
September 11
- I've been outta touch for the past 24 hours so I
don't know if this is old news or not, but Alfredo has
let us know that ---
Joe Wilson's FEC reports
during the 2006 election cycle were so bad
that the FEC found that the campaign was not in
substantial compliance with the Act and the
campaign got fined.
September 10 -
Okay, so I sent Joe The Dumber (thank you for that,
Sharon) a polite but pointed email at
Joe.Wilson@mail.house.gov
and I get a reply back saying it's an unattended mailbox
and ---
I sincerely
appreciate your taking the time to contact me. In an
effort to better serve you, please visit my website
at
www.joewilson.house.gov
or click this link provided
http://www.house.gov/formwilson/IMA/issue.htm
for your e-mail needs. From my website, I will be
better able to respond to your concerns.
Now, Honey, you just try going to that website or try
calling his phone number. No go.
So, I figure the best way to let Joe know that he's
earned a passel of hassles from me is to donate to his
opponent.
Apparently a few others had the same idea. I
gave mine through WesPac because I'm a big ole supporter
of Wesley Clark. You can do the same by
clicking right here.
Hey, I've been a fan of your "Kiss my big
blue butt" page for a while now, and just
had to comment on the whole "You Lie" thing.
I just wish us "liberals" had known just
shouting "You Lie" at the President is an
acceptable response. We'd have been able to
get TONS of mileage during Bushs presidency.
"Iraq was involved in 9/11" " YOU LIE!"
"Saddam has weapons of mass destruction"
"YOU LIE!"
"No one could have foreseen the levees
failing" "YOU LIE!" (and we had actual video
evidence of him being TOLD they could fail
before he said that one)
I just wish I was good with editing video
stuff or I'd MAKE a 'greatest lies of GWB'
compilation with "YOU LIE!" after every one.
September 10 -
Y'all, I don't mean to be ugly about this but does John
Boehner have jaundice?
Did you see him last night? It looks like he was
going for George Hamilton but got The Great Pumpkin
instead. It's kinda sad to see someone so
narcissistic that they'd do that to themselves.
Okay, so maybe not sad. I mean, if he wants to be
the color of Tang, that's actually kinda funny.
I wonder if he glows in the dark? However, I am
not volunteering to be the one who finds out.
Susan,
I know
I'm going to h-e-double toothpicks for
my irreverence toward such a
distinguished member of Congress, but
from the first time I saw him, I thought
of Boehner as "Orange Boner." And didn't
he look like he'd sucked on a lemon last
night?
Betty in
Georgetown
In my email to Nancy Pelosi, I
was going to ask if she could
somehow recommend to Mr. Boehner
that he lay off the tanning beds for
a while; he's beginning to look like
an ugly old pumpkin.
I deleted that sentence before
sending it. Looking back, I'm kinda
sorry I did that.
Lefty
September 10
- We had some neighbors over last night to watch the
President's speech. I'm glad we did because it was
a night for hugs.
I was delighted to have President Obama explain
liberalism so clearly and brilliantly to Republicans.
I am certain that the end of that speech was not easy to
do considering the sophomoric behavior of Republican
members of Congress.
What's the deal with them waving stuff in the air?
Is this junior high school? Good Lord, can you
even imagine what they would have done if we had done
that to George Bush and, dammit, George Bush did lie to
us and to Congress.
My friend David calls them Hatriots. That
has legs. That's gonna stick, at least around
here.
There was other
unacceptable behavior. Is this the way they'd
have their children behave? Is this the example
they want to set?
And bless South Carolina's heart. They are on the
path to righteously take the title of Nut Country from
Texas. By the way, Joe Wilson's phone number is
(202) 225-2452. His apology is insufficient.
And what was that poor guy who gave the response
talking about? The next time he gives a relevant
speech will be the first time he does it.
Thank you President Obama. It's great to have you
back.
YA GOTTA LOVE THESE "DUMB AS A BOX OF ROCKS"
REPUBLICANS!
It seems "Joe the Dumber" committed a court
marshal offense against his Commander in
Chief when he called President Obama a liar
during the speech last night.
Rep Joe Wilson is a Col in the US Army
reserves.
Please contact his Commanding Officer and
remind him of his duty to maintain
discipline in the ranks.
Article 88: Contempt Toward Officials: Any
commissioned officer who uses contemptuous
words against the President, the Vice
President, Congress, the Secretary of
Defense, the Secretary of a military
department, the Secretary of Transportation,
or the Governor or legislature of any State,
Territory, Commonwealth, or possession in
which he is on duty or present shall be
punished as a court-martial may direct.
Hugs,
Gramiam
What a great
time to be a Democrat … and be on the
right side of history! Obama did not
disappoint and neither did the
Republicans. Your comment about their
“responder” was dead on. What’s up with
the guys who pick these people? Can
anyone forget that moving speech by
Bobby Jindal? And the waving the
papers around? It looked like they were
saying” look Ma, I got an A”! And
Wilson? Guess he thought he was still
at one of his town hall meetings.
As I said,
never prouder to be a Dem!
d
Hatriots.
Perfect!!! Thank David for us all.
Carol
The Republicants acted like
they were at one of those
"Tea Parties." Did you
notice how Mitch McConnell
looked as if all the
clapping was for his when he
followed the President into
the chamber, or else he just
had an unfortunate case of
gas.
NOTE FROM
SUSAN: Margaret and Helen are who
I want to be when I grow up.
So
Congressvarmint Joe Wilson is a Colonel
in the US Army Reserves! Well that
explains why he shot off his mouth last
night. Any fool can tell you that the
two dumbest ranks in the US Army are
Second Lieutenant and a full Colonel.
Y'all
outta be nice to the boy, he was acting
with diminished capacity. At that grade
he's had a full frontal lobotomy and not
expected to get it reversed until well
after he retires or right after he gets
his second star.
Paul
September 9 -
It must be YouTube day here. This one is well
worth 52 seconds of your time ---
I am
deeply saddened that my inappropriate comments have
become a major distraction for my colleagues in the
Assembly ....
Duvall, Dude, major
distraction? Ya think?
Hon, if you think that only your comments are
inappropriate, you've got a real handle on being a
Republican.
You just gotta love Republican men.
As the
OC Weekly reports, Duvall has "blasted"
efforts to promote gay marriage, and got a 100
percent score from the Capitol Resource Institute,
which
describes its mission as to "educate, advocate,
protect, and defend family-friendly policies in the
California state legislature". In March, a
spokeswoman for the group called Duvall "a
consistent trooper for the conservative causes,"
adding that "for the last two years, he has voted
time and time again to protect and preserve family
values in California."
I mean, that level of dumbbutt has got to be hard to
maintain on a daily basis.
Susan,
What would we do for fun without
all those hypocritical "family
values" Republicans?
Barbara
I'll
bet his wife stands beside him
when he confesses to his
"shortcomings."
Beth
Duvall's behavior is gross on
two levels. 1. He is buying
sexual favors with taxpayer
dollars (both of his "conquests"
were lobbyist) and 2. Voters
continue to be suckers to vote
for republicans with "family
values" and lastly, Duvall is
very very ugly.
Nancy
Jeez, another
hypocritical Republican who
obviously has trouble
keeping his pants zipped up.
Why am I not surprised?
And is he apologetic
about being a dumba$$ who
doesn't understand what
fidelity in marriage means?
Nah....he's just sorry
his sorry a$$ got caught.
I am so sick of these
people. But you know....they
are great fodder for Jon
Stewart, David Letterman,
and Jay Leno.
Lefty
“I am deeply saddened
that my inappropriate
comments have become a
major distraction for my
colleagues in the
Assembly…”
Interesting priorities
Assemblyman Duvall has,
ain’t they? Sad about
the distraction for
fellow legislators, but
not a word about being
personally humiliated or
ashamed or embarrassed
for what he did to his
wife and kids.
And these are the right
wing nutcases who bleat
on endlessly about
family values, who wish
to deny gays and
lesbians equal
protection under the law
and worry about whether
our president is a
Kenyan or a socialist or
a fascist or
something. Don’t let
the door hit you in the
butt on the way out, Mr.
Duvall.
Dennis
Dear Susan,
I think Mr.
Assemblycritter Duvall
has some friends in
strange places. When I
clicked on the link to
his resignation page, my
security software wanted
to block it because it
was "Dangerous".
Believe in magic!
Don
From his statement
earlier today:
"This is a private
matter and I ask that
everyone respect the
privacy of all
involved."
LOLOLOL! It's an
irony-free zone over
there in Hypocrisyville.
Dawn
September 9 - Well,
I opened my copy of former State Representative Lloyd
Criss's new book, Rough and Tumble: Texas Political
Combat, at about 10:30 last night, figuring I'd read
a chapter or two and then call it a night.
I was up most of the night.
Literally, I could not put it down. Among other
delights, I met guys named Snake and Butterbean and came
to love both of them.
I thought I knew all there was to know about Texas'
best United States Senator in my lifetime, Ralph
Yarborough, but I didn't. Criss had a ringside
seat for the 1970 fight between Yarborough and Lloyd
Bentsen, and the sweat and blood spatters across the
pages of his book.
Criss, who is currently the chair of the Galveston
County Democratic Party is a colorful character in his
own right, and his upbringing prepared him to do battle
for progressive Democrats. You always want Lloyd
Criss on your side in a fight.
You will read about Baptist and Bingo, massage parlor
politics, and how brother went against brother in Texas
union elections.
It's just damn fun.
Lloyd Criss is a dandy Texas politician and hero of the
progressive movement, but, in all honesty, his greatest
gift to Texas is his only daughter, Judge Susan Criss of
Galveston County. Nobody will argue with me about
that, not even Lloyd Criss.
If you want to know how politics is done in Texas,
Get your
copy right here.
September 9
- Flying Duplicity on a Stick, Babe! Only in
Texas would a Super Bowl fieldtrip be sacrosanct.
Lord knows that "legendary Dallas Cowboy players" and
President Success, George W Bush, have an important
message for our schoolchildren.
The Arlington Independent School
District, which passed on airing President Barack
Obama's live classroom address, has announced that
some students will be bussed off campus to hear a
message from former President George W.
Bush
on Sept. 21.
District officials
said it's part of a Cowboys Stadium field trip that
the North Texas Super Bowl Host Committee invited 28
fifth-grade classes to attend several months ago.
Texas, I love yew. Nowhere else on earth would
this be considered anywhere near normal. If I were
to call the Arlington School District and attempt to
point out this odd set of weirdness, I would surely be
told, "What's your problem, Commie?"
I hope those parents that kept their
kids out of school used the time
wisely. Maybe some of them made
matching sheet and hood sets so they
can be fashionable at the next Tea
Party/Klan Rally.
Sam
Gee, the field trip story just added
one more to the 19,998 reasons I
already had for getting the heck
outta the Dallas area. I could stop
counting now that Bush lives in
Preston Hollow. That was good for a
million bonus points, but some games
are too much fun to give up.
Lux et veritas,
Mickey (this morning in wet
Wimberley)
I hope they're getting
permission slips and
providing a meaningful
alternative to the field
trip.
Arlington's
probably football crazy like
most of Texas, but there
MIGHT be a thinking person
among the parents of those
children.
Sarah
September 8
- I heard the President's speech to school children.
I'm a stone-cold total socialist now.
Hey, if
there's anything ignorant fearmongers should
fear more than anything else, it's their
children actually studying, getting good
educations, and learning skills like
critical thinking, which will help them
reject the kind of thinking the ignorant
fearmongers hope to promote.
John
Hi Susan! Imagine my surprise
when watching local 2 news last
night all of a sudden my very
own school board president was
being discussed. Wow! Did he
ever sound upset. Considering
the way he and his brethren
handled the “controversial”
broadcast from President Obama
today which, btw, was simply
dumping the decision off on the
poor teachers, I simply had to
find out about that letter he
sent to Sec of Ed Duncan.
So here it is. As you can
see he was pitching what my mama
always called a real hissy fit
because the Secretary’s letter
went to the schools not to the
school boards. Hmm. Could this
be a turf war? How exciting!
Anyway, in my humble (no pun
intended) opinion, what we saw
today was what I like to call a
real Terri Schivo moment. The
Rs have been more focused on
whipping up enthusiasm from
their fringes than doing the
right thing. If I were an
average non affiliated voter I
think I would take one look at
what’s been goin’ on the last
few days and say “holy cow I
don’t want to be a part of that
bunch of lunatics!” and that’s
the view from Kingwood.
Deborah
Kingwood
Boy that letter from
the school
board president sure did make him
look the fool.
I have a great story to share.
Yesterday my son came home from school
and in his folder there were two notes.
The first said that the school would not
be showing the President's speak on the
importance of education due to the loss
of instructional time and that the
broadcast could be seen at home via the
Internet or a rebroadcast on TV. The
second note was about a fundraiser the
school is doing for elastic shoe laces.
I asked my son about the fundraiser,
because we are always willing to help
the PTA supplement the school's program
with field trips and additional costs.
My son proceeded to tell me that they
watched, in his words, a very long
commercial about the shoe lace product.
The irony is killing me. Shoelaces over
the President of the United States.
Come on, SHOELACES. I'm sure we could
watch an infomercial about the shoelaces
on the Internet at home.
“As with a
Presidential inauguration or other national
broadcast event that contributes to the
development of respect for our country, Katy ISD
will make the President’s address part of each
school’s instructional plan,” the district said
in a statement Thursday afternoon.
“Allowing parents to opt their children out of
listening to our president or any other elected
official will be honored as we honor requests of
those who desire to opt out of saluting our
nation’s flag and reciting the pledge of
Allegiance.”
This is exactly how it should have been handled from the
start by every school district. If you don't
respect the office of the Presidency, you can leave the
room.
Read the comments after the story - the Birthers are
eating fire and spitting smoke. We should have
made these people get a permit to procreate.
And drop by to send an email to
Superintendent Alton Frailey.
September 6
- My friend Grace sent me this true story that
happened down in Needville ---
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a
remote pasture in Texas when suddenly a
brand-new BMW advanced
toward him out of a cloud of dust.
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci
shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out
the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you
exactly how many cows and calves you have in
your herd, Will you give me a calf?"
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then
looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly
answers, "Sure, Why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell
notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular
RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on
the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite
to get an exact fix on his location which he
then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans
the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in
Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image
processing facility in Hamburg , Germany...
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm
Pilot that the image has been processed and the
data stored. He then accesses an MS- SQL
database through an ODBC connected Excel
spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and,
after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page
report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet
printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have
exactly 1,586 cows and calves."
"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of
my calves," says Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the
animals and looks on with amusement as the young
man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can
tell you exactly what your business is, will you
give me back my calf?"
The young man thinks about it for a second and
then says, "Okay, why not?"
"You're a Republican Congressman from the U.S.
Government", says Bud.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how
did you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answered the cowboy.
"You showed up here even though nobody called
you; you want to get paid for an answer I
already knew, to a question I never asked. You
used millions of dollars worth of equipment
trying to show me how much smarter than me you
are; and you don't know a thing about how
working people make a living - or about cows,
for that matter.
We've
heard from the parents who threaten to
keep their kids out of school if their
school shows the president's speech.
Why
haven't the parents of kids who do want
to hear the president speak keep their
kids out of school? Works both ways.
Jesse
I had
no idea My Pet Goat was a secret plot to
indoctrinate Florida Elementary School
children. Now I understand why Dubya
couldn't interrupt the reading for news
of the attack on the WTC.
Thankfully my youngest graduated Elkins
High School last fall. I am tired of
FBISD after dealing with it for over 16
years. It is the problem of younger
parents now.
Barbara
September 4
- Oh y'all, it is at times like these that I truly
wish that God had made crazy painful. Then people
might do something about it.
Cynthia Dunbar, member of the Texas State Board of
Education who home schools her children and is emerging
from a very messy, public and embarrassing divorce from
her husband Glen, is hallucinating again.
Apparently, she thinks Obama is hiding under her bed or
in her closet where her husband used to be so she wears
a tin foil helmet and
gnashes her teeth a lot.
She is extremely disturbed about President Obama's
speech to school students --
"Understandable concerns may
arise that such an address has the potential to open
the door to students accepting an unconstitutional
level of direct accountability to National Governing
Authorities. The fact this presentation is being
made at a time when the parents of these students
will not be present to monitor the interaction makes
it even more problematic.
National Governing Authorities? Would that be
like, I dunno, Dick Cheney or somebody?
Cripes, Woman!, grab hold of them reins and shout
"whoa" before you head off to Camp Batcrap Crazy.
Honey, loco is camped out in your eyeballs. You're
driving the wrong herd to market, Babe.
Hon, when you are so crazy that you stand out like
black roots in bleached blonde hair in Texas, you've
accomplished something.
Go on, read the whole damn thing;
I dare you.
Cynthia, of course, is a founding member of the Belles
of Heaven Republican Women's Club but has most of her
religion held in a private trust.
Susan,
Sounds like The new nation of Texass has an
entire ready made National Board of
Education, ready to go. Has anybody extended
them citizenship yet?
Gramiam
Susan,
Regarding the astro turfers disrupting
meetings... behavior that would get you
thrown out of a Rolling Stones concert ought
to get you chunked out of these meetings
too.
Kate oDubh
Dear
Susan,
This blowup about the President's
address to school children has me puzzled.
More than one of the "He's tryin' ter
brainwarsh ar childruns" crowds has
mentioned a "hidden agenda" which is going
to "subvert" the children. It got me to
wondering, if it's a HIDDEN agenda, how is
it that only some people can see it? Is
this why they don't want you to take the 3-D
glasses out of the movie theatre? Because
they give you the power to see things that
are hidden? Or does it only require the
X-Ray Specs advertised in Batman comics
during the 50's? Maybe it requires special
headgear knit from steel wool to improve
reception.
Whatever it is, it's more contagious
than H1N1.
Don A in Pennsyltucky
Let us
pray....
Dear Jesus,
Please hurry up The Rapture or at least send
The Great Speckled Bird to haul off the
self-righteous. We ask this blessing for it
would at the same time improve humanity and
the chances for Peace on Earth.
Mickey
September 4 -
Okay, wait. I've got it. Now it's starting
to make sense.
The reason the Republicans are sooooo scared that
President Obama might brainwash their children is
because
they are fixing to brainwash ours.
Our State Board of Education (big sigh) has a plan -
Approved
textbooks, the standards say, must teach the Texan
student to "identify significant conservative
advocacy organizations and individuals, such as Newt
Gingrich, Phyllis Schlafly, and the Moral Majority."
No analogous liberal figures or groups are required,
prompting
protests from some legislators and committee
members.
Oh crap - we should have seen this coming.
Dear God, what have we gotten ourselves into
with the idiots???? Newt et all???? Holy
crap!
Carol
September 4
- I attended the health care rally at Houston City
Hall last night. I know some folks were worried
that the protestors would cause some problems since
their President, Glenn Beck, had them all riled up.
Not to worry about me because my friend David fixed me
up with the appropriate warning label. He said that some
woman at the rally gave it to him but I find that story
highly unlikely because David is the size of Vermont.
He looks like he ate his brother. He does not need
a button to remind people not to hit him. At least
the sober ones.
Anyway, the rally was very successful and my adopted
Congressman, Al Green, may be the best person in America
to diffuse protestors and steal their thunder.
He told the protestors that they could holler NO
throughout his whole speech tonight but when this night
is over, he goes back to Washington and he gets a vote
in the United States Congress and his vote is YES.
I love me some Congressman Al Green.
Here's a picture of Bubba with Al Green. That's
Bubba saying Thank You.
It was great being with good folks. A lot of my
friends from Fort Bend made the trip into Houston and
the Fort Bend Democrats Club even donated the candles
used at the end of the rally. Here's Geri,
Steve, and Bev holding those candles.
I was proud to be a part of that night. Democrats
are good people and we are patriotic about American
values, not just about war.
I need to thank Navid Zanjani and Amber Goodwin for
getting word to us about this rally. I also want
to thank my buddy Kathy Soltani for the candle thing and
for
all her hard work. Kathy works so hard that she
has to be careful not to drown in her own sweat.
For those of you asking about Marsha and wondering if
some danged fool
hit her again, the answer is that Marsha came
through unscathed. Here's Marsha and Kathy. Bubba
and Big Ole David stood guard on Marsha all night long.
In fact, I think she finally got so sick of it that she
hit them.
Isn't it nice
to go to an event and find out that what
they say is true. The naysayers are much
fewer in number, just louder and far more
rude. Just round up your Bubbas and your man
mountains and go, ladies. Remember, these
teabaggers are like rattlesnakes. They are
more scared of you than you are of them!
Gramiam
September 3 -
One of my Democratic buddies just called me. He's
sick at the stomach.
Because of "so many angry phone calls" his child's
elementary school principal has decided that no one can
see the President's speech. No one.
As my buddy said, "I thought we were supposed to be
teaching our children tolerance, where you politely
listen to opinions whether they differ from yours or
not."
But apparently in FBISD the vile aspects of fringe
mobocracy rule the day. What a disgusting lesson
to teach our children.
And patriotism is trampled on again by the rightwing.
What the hell has this man - Barack Obama - done to
deserve this level of hate? Nothing. Not one
damn thing.
But his name is not Ronald Reagan.
To add hypocrisy to mobocracy,
there's this at Media Matters.
On November 14, 1988, Reagan addressed and took
questions from students from four area middle
schools in the Old Executive Office Building.
According to press secretary Marvin Fitzwater, the
speech was broadcast live and rebroadcast by C-Span,
and Instructional Television Network fed the
program “to schools nationwide on
three different days.” Much of Reagan’s speech
that day covered the American “vision of
self-government” and the need “to keep faith with
the unfinished vision of the greatness and wonder of
America” but in the middle of the speech, the
president went off on a tangent about the importance
of low taxes:
And on the site there's other examples of Reagan
preaching rightwing doctrine to American schoolchildren.
So when did it become wrong for the President to
encourage schoolchildren?
When?
I'm madder than a wet hen. Deer Park
has posted on the district website, they
will "tape the broadcast" to make sure
its appropriate for children.
Wait--it
was ok for other Presidents of the
United States of America...but not for
this one?
Norma
From
Nick Anderson in the Houston Chronicle
Wright
Apparently some of them won't be, as
their parents prevent them from
attending school for a day rather
than risk exposure to a speech by
the President of the United States
on the topic of education.
Well, you can't be too careful. As
one shining light of the GOP once
put it, "A mind is a terrible thing
to lose" - and encouraging kids to
stay in school and get a good
education could mean losing them as
Republican voters in future.
Karen
Honey,
it's time to cut Texas loose ....
Seriously. Texas schools are not
going to let children watch the
elected United States President's
speech? You and Bubba can come live
with me and Jimmy. We have lots of
room...bring the animals. And
Maryland is BLUE. And we ship all
the nut jobs to Texas. And we can
work on that secession idea after
you're safely evacuated.
love,
kary
Susan,
Please join with me
watching Peabrain Olson do
everything he can to marginalize
this President. Peabrain Olson
admits he is attempting to polarize
his little children and brainwash
them to believe that anyone who
disagrees with them is not a real
American. I wonder if he sings
"Let There Be Hate On Earth" to them
every night when he puts them to
bed.
What a sick man and pathetic
parent.
Nancy J.
Susan,
About the president addressing
the kids in school and these
people raising **** about it,
this is the stupidest, dumbest
and most idiotic thing I have
ever heard.
I
have no kids in school, but here
in Victoria, the local dumb*****
decided not to let the kids see
it.
I
can only say another thing
before I start typing dirty
words, I expect the same thing
if Cornyn, Hutchison, Perry or
anyone other repub wants to talk
to the kids.
Jesse
I read now that Governor 39%
and his would be successor,
KBH, are “disturbed” by the
idea of a president speaking
to school children about
getting good grades, staying
in school and the
obligations of being a good
citizen. Wonder if they
were similarly “disturbed”
when President Reagan did
exactly the same thing –
even pushed for his tax cuts
– in 1988? Or perhaps
somebody can do some quick
research and tell me how
many time Rick Perry or Kay
Bailey have shown up at a
public school to talk about
those exact same issues.
Funny thing, but when Kay
Bailey made the most recent
of apparently never-ending
series of announcements
about running for governor,
notice where she did it? La
Marque high school.
These people are just
shameless – and apparently
quite seriously mentally
ill. But note this – on
this issue and so many
others, the GOP whack jobs
are winning. Lies obviously
work better than truth with
lots and lots of voters.
Dennis
It's brilliant! I knew
that Barak Obama would
find a way to drive the
nuts out of the public
taxpayer supported
schools. It will be
wonderful- no more
fundies trying to change
the history taught to
the kids, no more
fighting them for trying
to force required prayer
(the ones of their
choosing) no more
creationism crap taught
as science.
Now we "Obamabots" will
have the schools
exclusively for our
children alone. Of
course I worry that all
of this might make some
children to think that
they will not have to
pay attention to Nancy
Reagan's "just say no"
We all know how well
that worked.
We
gotta get Michelle to
deliver an address too,
cause that will scare
them crapless.
Anonymous
September 3
- Little Bubba, Almost Attorney at Law, found
something interesting about the FBISD letter to parents
who are very afraid to let their children watch the duly
elected President of the damn United States of America
encourage their children to stay in school and make good
grades.
If you will recall from yesterday, it seemed odd that
instead of asking parents to opt-out of seeing the
President, they asked parents to opt-in, thereby
insuring that lost permission slips would keep the
numbers watching the President very low.
Some total idiot at the district put
this pdf on their website explaining their idiotic
position. If you go to page three of that pdf, you
will find a sample letter. The sample letter
states ----
We understand that some parents may
not want their child/children to view the address so
we are asking that you fill out the form below and
return to your student’s social studies teacher by
Friday, September 4th. If you choose for your child
not to view the address....
Not. The letter says NOT.
So that means that some son of a motherless goat in
that pathetic excuse for a school district decided
to do the reverse and require a signed permission slip
to see the President of the United States of damn
America. Somebody sat down and deliberately
decided to change the rules for this President.
I want to know who that person is because they really,
truly need to kiss my big blue butt.
Susan. It is unfortunate that the mother of
all those strange Texas people did not stay
a virgin.
Bud
September 2 - UPDATED. What follows is generally known in
Texas as a walleyed snot nosed hissy fit. I
haven't had one in a long spell, so it's apparently time
to pitch one.
I know I live in Nut Country. I know some of the
people here are rightwing, uneducated, narrow-minded
lunatics. I understand that.
I just sometimes forget the depth of that damn
ignorance and meanness.
The following letter went home today with students at
an elementary school in the Fort Bend Independent School
District. I am quoting verbatim, leaving nothing
out but the name of the school.
September 2, 2009
Dear Parents,
On Tuesday, September 8, 2009, President Obama will
deliver a national address directly to students on
the importance of education. The President will
challenge students to work hard, set educational
goals, and take responsibility for their learning.
The address will air at 12:00 eastern time and will
be broadcast live. Here at XXX XXXX Elementary, we
will record the address and integrate it during our
social studies time at 2:00 p.m. XXX XXX Elementary
and Fort Bend ISD are not requiring students to view
the address nor will we take any grades during the
address. We understand that some parents may not
want their child/children to view the address so we
are asking that you fill out the form below granting
your permission for your child to view the address.
If you choose for your child not to view the
address, they will be secured in a supervised
location for the address and will return to class
once it is complete. We are asking that this form
be returned on Friday, September 4th so that
teachers may plan accordingly in their classrooms.
As always, if you have any questions or concerns,
please call the school.
Let me get this straight: some parents would not
want their children to view an address from the duly
elected President of the United States of America
telling their children that education is important and
that they should be responsible citizens.
I need the names of those parents because if we ever
need an Idiots List, we'll have a place to start.
Some people would rather their child be put into a
secured location rather than view the President of the
United States.
He's black, you know, and just listening to him might
turn their kid into a ... I dunno, a graduate of Harvard
Law School?
At best, this letter is an attempt to polarize children
while they are at school. It is inexcusable on
that level alone.
More importantly, it is clearly meant to dismiss and
marginalize the President of the United States as an
optional President.
What the hell message is the school sending? That
the President is illegitimate and not worthy of
attention. Oh Lord, if George Bush had done this
it would have been required and the kids would have been
encouraged to bring pom-poms.
My letter to parents would have said, "The President of
the United States is going to address children about the
importance of education. Little Johnny will sit
down, shuddup and listen because it's the damn President
of the damn United States of America, and little Johnny
might learn good manners and he just might learn
something else from this very smart man. If you
think that might hurt Little Johnny, then you need to
toughen your wimpy little kid up."
He was elected fair and square in one of the biggest
landslides in recent history.
Get over it.
No, I'm serious, you need to get over it. This is
getting waaaay outta hand. You are drawing little
children into your hate of this man.
UPDATE:
It went out to every school in
Fort Bend ISD
The Superintendent can be reached at
(281)634-1000. Remember to be polite because
that's what separates us from the Teabaggers - we have
good manners and were not raised in a barn.
Do not give them ammunition that we're a anything but
polite. But, be persistent that you're a proud
American who believes in the electoral process.
Insist that they take your name and phone number.
Fort Bend ISD takes state funds so feel free to call
from anywhere in the state. It's your money they
spent.
Man, I'm
pitching a hissy fit right beside you
sister. I suppose this plan is the
alternative to keep the kids from missing
school on the 8th. I read on one of my
other liberal blogs about a big movement to
keep the kids home that day so they won't be
indoctrinated into socialism by our
democratically elected president. I'm going
to have to tie on a scarf to keep my head
from exploding. I tried to find the blog by
googling "keep kids home September 8" and
you don't even want to see the crazzzies
that came up. I had to google XXX just to
get the stink off. I hope every one of
those kids who missed school on the 8th
should be marked for an unexcused absence.
Keep up the good work.
Kathy F.
Publish
the name of the school. They sent the
letter home, its public record, and they
should have to stand behind what they
send home.
James
Note
from Susan: James wrote this before I
discovered that it went to every school in
the district. I agree with him.
If you haven't called,
emailed, written, screamed at the Supt,
Principal, and the entire damned school
board just yet, I have to wonder what
you're waiting on.
Tell me
who and I will.......and I know you will
also.
Best,
Bob A.
Two years ago I had lunch with my
grandson at his elementary school in
Fort Bend Co. There was a large
framed portrait of George W. Bush in
the entry hall, beyond the front
door. After lunch I was invited
to visit in the classroom, and the
screensaver on the TV in the
classroom was a portrait of Bush.
Do you think this was brainwashing?
Wanda
Hey, Susan! I
just wanted to let you know that
I share your pain (see email
below) I am so mad about this
email I can barely stand it. I
guess I didn’t realize that the
president of the United States
talking to school children about
the importance of education was
so controversial and possibly
infringing on anyone’s rights.
I suppose that would be the well
known Right to be Close Minded
and Ignorant! Thanks for
putting words to my anger!!
In Pain in
Kingwood
Please note the following
announcements and news items:
As you may be aware, President
Obama will be addressing the
nation's school children over
the internet on September 8,
2009. As classes are
well-engaged in curriculum at
this point in the new year,
Humble ISD will not be directing
a district-wide viewing of this
Presidential address.
Rather, we will treat this
address as we have treated
Presidential Inaugurations and
other national event broadcasts.
Principals, in collaboration
with teachers, will employ their
instructional autonomy and use
their professional judgement to
determine if the broadcast
enhances the planned curriculum
and instruction in the classroom
to decide whether to view the
broadcast or not.
As we have done in the past, if
any parent or student requests
to be excused from the activity,
campuses will honor this request
and provide the opportunity to
engage in another constructive
opportunity on the campus for
the duration of the broadcast.
Humble
NOTE FROM SUSAN: Let us
all pray that Humble ISD is not
teaching spelling during this
"another constructive
opportunity." I kinda feel
certain that the President can
at least teach someone to spell
"judgment" correctly.
Humble ISD can be contacted at 281-641-1000. You
might ask for their address to
drop off a dictionary or maybe a
fifth grader who can spell.
Susan,
Why are a handful of bigoted,
hateful, unAmerican people being
allowed to disrupt the American
way? This proves that they
are raising a new generation of
hateful people.
Carol
I'm with you, Susan. I
sent a very pointed, direct
email to FBISD, asking them
basically WTF is wrong with
them. Are they against
education? Are they against
the students hearing a
message about education from
the President?
I told them I'm glad I no
longer work for them and I'm
ashamed I ever did.
Bunch of rightwing,
knuckledragging freaks.
They're probably kissing
Tom DeLay's butt right about
now.
Or Pete Olson. Same
difference.
Lefty
Even the conservative
old
Houston Chronicle has
picked up on the idea that
this is being done for
political reasons.
We they even get around to talking about the damn
socialized liberries.
Libraries let the government buy books, thereby
harming capitalism in the publication industry and then
they let any damn commie who wants to come read the
books owned by the government. That's socialism.
It has to stop. And, in my humble opinion, Sean
Hannity and Ann Coulter should be the first to demand
that their books not be housed in socialized libraries
in America.
Here is the latest poll about what
Americans want in Health Care. Pay
particular attention to the Republican take
on it.
Sounds
like Barton is another candidate for the
Legislature of the new nation of "Texass".
Can you
recommend a quiet, utterly useless part of
Texas that the state can apportion to these
folks for their new country. Then we can
send them there and do exactly what they
want. Leave them the hell alone!
Gramiam
They can
have Abilene, Midland/Odessa and most of
Lubbock.
Anybody got any better ideas?
Susan
Susan,
After the War Between the States, lots of
unhappy secessionists took off to Brazil. I
understand there are many of their
descendants still living there and "keeping
up the Old Southern traditions". (I have
amused myself for moments on end speculating
as to just what that might mean). I'd like
to see this band of modern-day "rebels" out
of the country since they profess to hate it
so. Could they be taught Portuguese and
encouraged to head to South America?
Mickey
Susan,
The
utterly, useless part of Texas I live
in, Victoria, can be of use to some of
these guntoters.
Jesse
How
about Oklahoma? Nobody else seems
to be using it.
Kara
Dear Susan,
I
found this map for Texans wishing to
secede. I hope they find this
helpful.
September 1 -
Y'all have heard me tell Texas Congressvarmint Smokey
Joe Barton to kiss my big blue butt before now.
However, he's earned a hoot to go along with it now.
Smokey Joe fails to realize two truths: (1)
elections have consequences, and (2) you should never
make threats with your mouth that your butt can't cash.
Now you folks from foreign states understand why we
consider him to be charmingly unencumbered by IQ points.
Susan,
I
just lost a few IQ points
watching that clip of that
idiot. He really thinks the
Rethugs are going to take over
the House because health care
reform passes without their
help? Permanent Majority, my
a$$.
Barbara
September 1 -
I think I might be over the legal limit of buddies named
Bob, but my friend and neighbor Bob Dunn is back tending
his blog and has done some great reading.
This one will make you grin, and this one will
scare crap outta ya.
Susan, you
can have all the pals named Bob as you want
as long as they all can write as well as
these two.
May
September 1 - My
buddy El Jefe Bob over at
The Daily Hurricane got himself his first guest
blogger - Howard Dean.
And if you haven't played at El Jefe's
Smeep Forum,
you're missing a lot of fun.
September 1
- The Texas Observer has done us all a huge favor.
They went to the Crazyfest in front of the Capitol in
Austin so you wouldn't have to. You never know,
this stuff might be contagious and until they prove
otherwise, I ain't getting near these people.
WATCH the video where folks in cowboy hats call for
another Texas revolution!
READ about the Texas Nationalist Movement's
readiness for a new civil war!
SEE the photos of the crowd rallying with portraits
of President Obama in white face!
IGNORE these rightwing extremists at your own risk!
You can count on The
Texas Observer.
You can count on the Observer. Yes, you can.
Welcome to the website formerly known as The World's Most
Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc.
My name is
Susan DuQuesnay Bankston.
I live in Richmond, Texas, in heart of Tom DeLay's old
district. It's crazy here. No, seriously, it's
triple z crazzzy.
I used to be an independent voter, but that all changed when
I got to know a few local Republicans. They are meaner
than 10 acres of snakes and have the ethical compass of a
bank robber.
So, I
decided that they could just Kiss My Big Blue Butt.
A lot of
what I post here has to do with local politics, but you
probably have the same folks in your local government.
This ain't
a blog. Blogs are way too trendy for me. I've
been doing this since 1992, so I'm used to it even if you
ain't.
Email me
and I'll find a place to put it if I like it.
Susan-
I'm suspecting that he's gonna come up short in the
keeping up department tonight, but, mercy, watching him
Tango is gonna be fun. 
Gov.
Rick Perry’s broad criticisms of Washington
Republicans aren’t sitting well with Washington
Republicans.
You get to take people's money, not ever send the fax,
and attempt to delegitimize the President all at once.
Unlike
people without health insurance, homeowners have
access to public option flood insurance.
He
told a meeting of the Morgan County Republicans on
Wednesday night that Obama already has or will have
the three things he needs to make himself a
dictator: a national police force, gun control and
control over the press. “He has the three things
that are necessary to establish an authoritarian
government,” Broun said. “And so we need to be
ever-vigilant, because freedom is precious.”
First, he resigns from Congress. Then he tries to
find a job. Having no luck at actually working for
living, he writes a book called No Retreat, No
Surrender, which is ironic considering that he
retreated, surrendered, and ran away from Congress
waving a white flag while speaking French. The
book sells three copies. 
The Huffington Post has set up a special Rick Perry is
Going To Hell Faster Than An Angel Can Catch Him
If
anyone was wondering how HTT
out-altituded his dance partner,
here is the uncropped truth.
Rep.
Kevin Brady asked for an explanation of why the
government-run subway system didn’t, in his view,
adequately prepare for this past weekend’s rally to
protest government spending and government services.
Here's the deal. I'm
going to the most popular Mexican restaurant in town for
lunch and a Margarita with some girlfriends. We
have decided that if we see any Republicans in the
restaurant who even look like they might be celebrating
Deis y Seis, we're going to go to their table and holler
"You lie!" repeatedly. 
Did you see him last night? It looks like he was
going for George Hamilton but got The Great Pumpkin
instead. It's kinda sad to see someone so
narcissistic that they'd do that to themselves.
Not to worry about me because my friend David fixed me
up with the appropriate warning label. He said that some
woman at the rally gave it to him but I find that story
highly unlikely because David is the size of Vermont.
He looks like he ate his brother. He does not need
a button to remind people not to hit him. At least
the sober ones.
He told the protestors that they could holler NO
throughout his whole speech tonight but when this night
is over, he goes back to Washington and he gets a vote
in the United States Congress and his vote is YES.
It was great being with good folks. A lot of my
friends from Fort Bend made the trip into Houston and
the Fort Bend Democrats Club even donated the candles
used at the end of the rally. Here's Geri,
Steve, and Bev holding those candles. 
for
all her hard work. Kathy works so hard that she
has to be careful not to drown in her own sweat.
